Friday, December 30, 2016

the diary of a teenage girl phoebe gloeckner


alison takes up a kind of space in the work that is not defensive, that is expansive, that opens windows so that lots of people can see themselves through this specifically lesbian story. there's often those moments when you see sort of layers of time or layers of generation all in one frame and so you get this sense that something is beinghanded to you in this kind of digestible

nugget but also invited to kind of go quiteliterally deep into each individual frame. she managed to to examine her life, i think intellectually and her intellect gave voice to her heart in a sense. it's very powerful.

Thursday, December 29, 2016

the diary of a teenage girl movie


a lot of things happened today. it ended with getting a demolition noticefor the house that i'm renting. oh well, life. don't pick your nose in front of thecustomer, they might lose their appetite. got my back turned, auntie. eya, o. miss! yes, sir? miss, what time is it?

it's time... miss? it's time for you to love me. what? get him off here. he's just been relaxingsince he got here. he's taking advantage of our restaurant. we don't have aircon. not even wifi.

just make him leave. my apologies, sir... - what do you want to order?- can i order... you? take out? miss, sorry. i think my date'snot coming anymore. so maybe next time. thank you. hey. are you okay?

do you want to have ice cream? what flavor? hold it. i don't even know you. what do you think of me?someone you can just drag along? who's that girl who stood you up? well, i've been courting her for 1 year. but she hasn't answered me yet. wow some perseverance. and you're still expecting.

you? me? what's your story? i'm a royalty from england. direct descendant of queen elizabeth. joke. i became an orphan when i was 14. my parents died in an accident. when i was 18,right after i blew my birthday candle,

my aunt kicked me out of the house. why? co'z i'm no longer a kid. that's sad. what if we end up together? joke iang. chill! what's this? pepper spray! okay now.thanks for the ice cream. bye.

sure, you're welcome, peppy. peppy? pepper spray. you didn't get it? bye, peppy- is "crush" here already? i don't think so. who's that? must be the new scholar girl. doesn't seem she can afford this school.

how annoying. they're just fair-skinned.they're not pretty. miss, miss. it's just an accident. i'll take you to the clinic. i'm okay. are you sure? sure. miss, i'm okay. thank you. my brain was just shaken a bit.

here. okay, bye! ugly and clumsy. double whammy. what? can you still do it? that's howl climb up the stairs. ba-bye! excuse me, can i ask something? 3,500 a month.1 month advance, 1 month deposit.

5,000 meralco deposit. 2,500 for water,1,500 for smoke detector. 1,000 for the key. shared bathroom.there'll be 4 of you in a room. you can't bring a boyfriend.and you can't have a dog here. what? are you taking it? no. i got a boyfriend. really? boss, please.give me any kind of job... except the one,which i have to sell my body.

i'm desperate. it shows. wow, that hurts. you can't work there if you're sensitive. i'm not sensitive. just my skin. please. okay. get an nbi,barangay and police clearance. thanks, brother. whether it's a vertical clearance.or even clearance sale.

- thank you. thank you.- okay, okay. wow, looks like h! fitperfectly in this mansion. i can feel h. my life will change here. miss, rodriguez? yes? mr. sandford's waiting for you. okay. i hope you'd stay long.

20 have already resigned before you. my son is a difficult person. you will have to beresponsible for all his needs. make sure he goes to his class. that's easy. not really. my son is human. but also, he is half monster. like werewolf.

monster in a big vase. zuma. i don't like it. 25,000 basic salary. with benefits includingboard and lodging. i'm ready. i already broughtmy things with me. where will i... it's noisy and unruly... hun-y!

cross. what now, you old toothless fart? you don't have to be rude. right. what's your problem? first, your dad is not a fart. second, he's not toothless. third, your dad is so gorgeous. don't be rude to your father.

who's this? whoever... no whatever you are... get out! i don't want to see you pokingthat face when i get back. see what i mean? yes. he's mean but i'm not a quitter. - don't wait for cross.- oh, ma'am! ma'am, i'm sorry.

but you startled me. it's okay. i'll just wait for cross.this is part of my job, anyway. go get some rest. this is mine. you're still here. - this is mine. give it to me.- this is mine. this is my water. - give it to me.- it's mine. it's mine.

hey take it slow. take it slowly. if you break anything,i'd be responsible for it. oh no. let's go there. fix yourself. where are we? your room. slowly.

wait. change your clothes.your shirt stinks. turn around. no peeking. i'm not interested. hurry. you're really rude... hey, get your clothes on! hey! you want to get drunkyet you can't handle it.

hey, get your hands off me! admit it. you got a crush on me. hey thick-skinned!don't be so full of it. let me go. you're so pretty. you're rude. hey, don't sleep yet.change your clothes. i love you. what? i love you?

"i love you" in your face. that shameless! he threw up on melike a toilet bowl. shameless. hey, missyou on the grass... and the plants. sorry. hi, i'm lory. you are? eya. boy problem.

exchange student? no. i've beenstudying here since kinder. you're good in tagalog. my parents are british,but i grew up here. and yes i'm loyal to willford academyco'z my crush is here. i'm a scholar here. do you know cross sandford? yes. i do have class.

sorry, i've got to go. bye. nice to meet you. okay. eye- oh my god. he's coming. there he goes. the prince is so near. no way. he's looking at me. rodriguez! kidding! he knows her?

ambitious frog! kokak! buy these. i need it for tomorrow. make sure these are complete or else. manila paper, pentel pen... ma'am a total of 3,893.50. can you have these reserved for me? ma'am sorry but i've punched it already.

my supervisor is on break.no one will make these items void. that dumb. did you just call me dumb? guard! - no, miss. no.- miss? please include mine. sir, a total of 4,043.50. excuse me... are you stalking me?

no! what are you? why are you always saving me? flelax, peppy- thank you, sir. thank you, ma'am. need help with that? actually, can i borrow some cash for cab? i'll pay it. no need.

when i need to ask you a favor next time,you're gonna help me, okay? just tell me when. okay. see you. you've asked me to buy a lot of thingsbut you didn't give me any money. why didn't you ask? i thought you havecash funds from my dad. you may leave. you're 50 pesos short. why do you know cross sandford?

why do you know chad jimenez? why can't i be friendly? you're not supposed to have any friends. you have little friends on your face. and you deserve them. i bet she's got them all over her body. stop! stop! you little chicken poxes, let go of her. who are you calling chicken poxes?

yeah, is that i? no, not you. you are beautiful. but you, you and you,leave her alone or die. what did they do to you? they're bullying you because of cross? are you dating him? of course not. why? you like him? since kinder.

ouch, lasting love. can i just help you with something else? come on. just for her size. - come on.- let's go. that's ok. now for the shoes. let's see if h goes nice with the dress. it's high. can i take it off now? miss, i'll get this one.

is it nice? that's 250,000? isn't nice enough? i hope she likes it. is she pretty? she's like you. so she's ugly, too. peppy, she's pretty. you know, don't belittle yourself.

you're so beautiful. so try it on. oh perfect. hey, peppy. go to the party, alright? i'm not invited. that's why i'm inviting you, right? we'll see. what was that? don't tell me...

may i go out? yes, you may. what's that smell? he's calling you. what do you need? you know, for a maid you're rude. co'z you're my idol. what can i do for you, your highness? you know, for a human being, you're rude.

come with me to the party. and tomorrow we're going somewhere. how many layouts? just 4. where's stand-by area. this way. okay good. stay here. hey, don't just look dumb there.

are you gonna turn it offor i'll kill you? give me your cellphone. give it to me. didn't i tell you,no cellphones during my shoot? no, no, no! stand up. out. hey, it's not gonna ring anymore. can we just finish the shoot? get back.

sit down there. sit down. hurry. go, go, go. back to work, guys. back to work. change set-up. change set-up. wrong. okay good. okay. there, relax. okay. nice. turn here for profile. sorry about what happened, monster...i mean master. thank you, too.

in your face. it's your fault. i just don't want some drama. i didn't know thatcellphone's not allowed. after you fix my things,you can take a time off. here you go. that's delicious. go. indeed, delicious. yummy.

thank you for inviting me. of course. you know what, eya? i really, really like you. are you a lesbian? i like you as a friend.as a friend. relax with the fork. you know, you're notpretentious like others. you made me nervous with that one.

so are we bffs now? on saturday, you should be there. my birthday, infinity palace. okay? are my pimples having sexthat's why they're multiplying? this one's gonna explode soon. taal, mayon, pinatubo... - oh there's a twin.- hey, are you scaring me? i'm resting here you know.get out of here.

is cross there? he's still inside. excuse me? what did you say? don't you ever dare speak his name. hey tomatoes! don't you call me tomato. you! how dare you slap me!

don't! stop m - cross!- what's the problem? help me. she's bullying us. bullying? you slapped me. girls, listen up. i would like you allto meet my girlfriend, so please be nice to her. and leave her alone, okay? come here.

what are you saying? i intentionally said thatto make them angrier on you. so you and your pimpleswill be miserable. are you crazy? are you stupid? have you been taking drugs? are you a drug addict? oh my gosh! here she comes. it's so not true.

witchcraft is the only explanation. witchcraft is the only explanation... or blackmail... that is so true. eya, we need to talk. friend, thank goodness you came. is it true? you could've just told methat cross is your boyfriend. hey, that's not true. then why are you guys always together?

this is just a secret. don't tell anyone. i'm cross' personal maid. “mex! i'm envious. what are you? try to be that monsterslash devil's personal maid. is he that bad? peppy, i've been looking for you.

let's talk. i can't take this anymore. even kuya kim couldn't explain this. she's cross' girlfriend andtwo-time cheating with chad. what a nightmare! peppy, you should knowsomething about me. what is it? oh my god, is this real? i want to believe i'm beautiful.

peppy, i can't hold this anymore. i need to quench my thirst. i'm a vampire. you're so annoying. hey, best friend, don't be irritated. what do you mean best friend?are we close? best friend,it's lory's birthday tomorrow. i need you with my plan, please. what is your dark planfor my best friend?

best friend, relax. here's my plan. when the lights turn off at 12 midnight, i'll get lory's hand. and i'll take her to the garden. and there i'll give her the ring. then i'll ask her to be my girlfriend. that's sweet, right? you've already iron out your plan,you don't have to get me involved.

this is where you come in. make sure you'll give this to lory. and make her wear it. co'z it has a tracker inside.that way i can tell that it's her. you're giving yourself a hard time. why don't you just proposein the middle of the party? of course it's moredramatic when it's dark. then, i'll grab herlike there's a kidnap scene. sweet.

thanks, peppy- guess, what? i love you! - thank you!- chad! thank you, thank you. you're so kind. you stink. to infinity and beyond! eya! be thankful i've taken you here.

hello, i'm invited, too. - hey, what's up?- hey bro. you got a date. what? no! she's my personal maid. i'm ian and you're eya. sorry about my best friend.he seemed to be mad at the world. i'm used to him. is he really like that since birth?

i think it started when his mom died. he really made his momthe reason behind this. i'm an orphan. nothing. party! party! party! bro, let's go. can i get a lot? now that's gluttony.

o chad. o by the way, you take care of it. did you see lory. sorry, no. lory? lory! joke, sorry. lory! lory, somebody wantsto give this to you. listen well.

let me finish first before you speak. i know that you alreadylove somebody else. but believe me, he's not worth it. i love you very much. give me a chance to love you. be my girlfriend. dude, are you 95v? chad? cross?

this is so embarrassing. chad! you ruined everything. that's enough. that's enough. hey, eya, whom are you talking with? no one auntie. crazy. auntie, i was just dreaming.

hey, how many times did i tell you thatyou should stop creating those fantasies. you should keep your feet on the reality. even if i'm dreaming, auntie,your role is to wake me up. eya, you're already an orphan. you should know how to deal with life. where will you go when i'm already gone? why, auntie? where are you going? oh, nowhere. you know dogs are mad at cats.

cat? do i look like a cat? wh? did you go here? i waited for you co'z i knowyou're on your way home. here's for you. use that, okay? it's just something. i bet, cross has been insulting you. you know, the first time i saw you,i knew you have a good personality. you went all the way hereto give me a tribute. ian...

he's like a drug addict. i'm so... can we do that next time? are you blind? i just saw a ghost. wait, ghost? yes. ghost mn'! ' who's mary?

mary, the one who appearsat the student council room. it was said that she was raped. white lady. are you kidding me? kidding? if you want, we can look for her. later. go to student council room. i got a meeting there.

you're the one who has a meetingyet you're asking me to get there. maybe you're scared. i want you to go there co'z i wantmy personal maid to be there. if you won't show up,i'll get my hands on you. yo, guys, sit down. hi, cross. hi, bro. and now we can start. hi, guys.

as you all know, we havea school fair coming up soon. we need ideas now. bye! bye. 5y9, guys. bye, thank you. cross, i'll go ahead. you still need to fill out the forms. i'll just do that at home.

you won't need it tomorrow, right? no, let's finish it. it's my parent's anniversary.we've got family dinner. why? are you scared to be alone? no. why would i be scared? okay, i'll be the one to do itthen i'll email it to you. that's okay. i'll kill that pimples. the subscriber cannot be reached.

please try again later. who are you? go away. mommy! eya, where are you? these kids don'! knowhow to lock the door. hey, wake up. did you see mary? the white lady.

that's not true. i just made that up. no, i saw her. that's just me. the one i saw doesn't have pimples. you know, for a monster, you're a coward. admit it. you're scared. shut up. you're fired. your dad's the one who's paying me. so,your dad is the only one who can fire me.

let's go. it's locked. why did you lock it? i didn't. call the school guard. i don't have a load. that's incredible. co'z you're a beggar. poorest of the poor.

and 119w- why don't you make the phone call. i got no charge. i didn't bring my charger. gorgeous rich kid with a postpaid line. no charger. amazing. is that you? get off there. that's my place. move.

get your own place. get off there. she can't be reachednow that she's needed. wait 'til i get my hands on her. let's sleep. no. just talk to me first. what are we gonna talk about? tell me something about you. what do you want to know?

why are you ugly? where are you hiding your horn and tail? why are you poor'? co'z i don't have parents. where are your parents? they died in an accident when i was 14. you? where's your mom? she died in a plane crash when i was 5. that's why you're like that.

what am i? nothing. like that. you're lucky you still have a dad. go to sleep. okay, sleep then. hey, what are you doing here? go home. don? you have classes? fm gonna tell them about this.

here, it's done. can i sleep now? make a sign. i wanted to say, welcome to willford academy. you're rich, why don't you justprint it on a tarpaulin? jack? i didn't know you like to watch that. robert?

i won't then. don't switch it. i'm not paying you to watch tv. i'll do the sign outside. dark night, terror comes out... hey cut it out! lady in white... - sorrowful...- stop it.

cut it out. clothes with blood... just shut up. i'm not listening. mary... o mary! shut up! mary! shut up. i said shut up. what? i'm just whispering in the air.

who are you whispering with? her! mary! where? coward. sleep here. you're not leaving this roomuntil your finish it. he looks better when he's sleeping. even if he's bad. chad loves lory.

lory loves cross. but if cross loves lory. he wouldn't let chad court her. who's cross' love? maybe just himself. he left early. my boss has a good heart. damn. he playedconnect the dots on my face! he must've used indelible ink.

i see the star. i see the moon. i know who owns that. coach, can i take a break? okay 30 minutes. we need to talk. please forgive me. are you gonnakill me? have mercy on me. peppy! peppy, relax. i'm not mad. you're mad. you said,"you ruined everything." peppy, i know youdidn't like what happened.

but let's just forget it. peace? smells like chad. he's so nice. he let me borrow his shirt. when you're done hugging yourself,go see your boss. okay. yes. uqw, is that you? this is me, monster. monster!

only monsters like you arecapable of drawing on my face. sorry. so it's your face. i thought connect the dots. i'll kill you, you monster! get off me. wait, why are you hot? did you just come in from sauna? forget it. just leave. your fever is high.

stay there. i'll get a medicine. stay there. if you have a plan of poisoning cross,i'll understand. but have fear in god. i don't want to go to hell.i might see him there. it might contain poison. it doesn't have poison. come on. you're sweating. take off your clothes. go change.

i don't like. you might rape me. take care of yourself. you're big enough. what do you want, cookie monster? i can't sleep. turn off the aircon. what else? water. we'll take you to the hospital. i'd rather die than go to the hospital.

what do you want? go straight to the morgue? okay, wake up the driver. i'll go to the hospital. don't come. we'll just go. eya, i know you have classes tomorrow.but can you make an absence? cross needs to beaccompanied in the hospital. he doesn't want me to come. don't take whateverhe says on face value.

my son has a lot of differences. why is that? he wants to show everyonethat he doesn't need anyone. but he keeps on asking meto do a lot of things for him. you know, my son has a lot of hang-ups. what are you doing here? i told you so. i've talked to your doctor. you have an intestinal flu.

let's wait for the attending physician.let her tell us that. if you need anything, call me. hey, bro, how are you? hey! what took you guys so long? hi! dude, what's up? what's up 9 dude.

it's good that you visited me here. what do you want? coffee, juice? no, no. h! go get h. i'll buy it downstairs. - no, eya's here.- i'll do it. okay, can you get me a juice? how many fraps? frap? juice for you?

i'll go with you? that's it. okay. i might not beable to carry all of it. come with me eya. you take care of cross. okay- ian, why did you give methose skin care products? i want you have smooth skin. are you a dermatologist?

or you're practicing on me. nothing. i just wantyour skin to be smooth. so you'd be pretty. wow you're nice. just like a fairy godmother. so cross would notice you. co'z you two match. you're crazier than your friend. it's like this.

cross is my friend. i know him better. he's kind. he just doesn't want to show it. no. leave the lights on. heyâ» ugly. are you still up? sleeping- ugly, come here. sleep beside me.

ugly! i don't like.you can't even say "please". e ya. - move. i want to sleep now.- hold it. come on. i'll just check your iv. ouch. you didn't do it gently.you knew it's tight. you just forced me.

hi, miss. i want you to know thatthis is a hospital not a motel. ma... mommy. don't leave me. - he's cute when he's playing coward.- don't... even a monster has a heart. sleep now. i'm just here.

chad! come on. lory and i will have lunch.come with us. - no.- let's go. she's avoiding me. that's why i'm taking you with meso you could talk to her. calm down. lory, i took chad with me.we'll have lunch with him. oh dear. i forgot. i still have something to do.sorry.

eya, we're going somewhere later. surprise. better go. go after her. next time, peppy, let me do the strategy. i'll just wait for you outside. no, come. it's my beautytreatment day today. i don't have beauty to be treated. come on now, don't be silly.

good afternoon, miss lory.the usual? yes but it's gonna be the two of us. wow! i didn't know that asidefrom sss and pag-ibig benefits... your maid is entitledfor a salon treatment. she's not my maid. she's my best friend. i'm sorry. miss julie, can you please attendto miss lory and her best friend. this way, ma'am.

i'm pretty. like us? wow. - 12,000.- lory, how much is it? don't worry, this one's on me. and that is because you look gorgeous. they have to see you like thatin the legendary ball of willford. what's that? it's a masquerade ball.

we're gonna wear a mask, then whydo we have to make ourselves beautiful. we have to make ourselves pretty co'zthere's gonna be a rigodon of dances. and at 12 midnight,whoever you're dancing with, he'll be your special someone. that's corny. it's not if i'll be with cross. i'll do what i can to be close to him. i don't know what's in himthat you like him a lot. cross is my classmate since elementary.

and because i was a transferee, i always get bullied. and cross was there.he was my knight in shining armor. he always stood up for me. this monster has a secret kindness. are you sure it's cross? maybe that's someone whohas the same name as his. hey, chad. this is me eya. peppy-

i know. wow. i mean i need you. come with me. where are we going? just somewhere. hi, chad. don't you think eya's so gorgeous? what? eya? no, that's just hot oil. admit it. you had a plastic surgery.

admit it. you had a brain surgery. let's go gorgeous. nice one. you're good at baking. sorry. the cupcakesturned out just enough. i won't be able to make you taste it. it's okay. i'm full already just by smelling it. hey, peppy. please give this to lory.

you're so sweet. lory's lucky with you. but the guy who will love you is luckier. who are you? what are you doing here? why are you opening the ref. are you a thief? thief! 'day. don't be oa. if i were a thief, i'd go straightto the rooms not in the kitchen.

manang! manang look at eya! eya? what did you do? did you see a witch doctor? hello. that's just soap and water. where can i get that soap and water? yes. where can we buythat soap and water... it would be betterfor you to go upstairs... because your boss isthrowing tantrums again.

manang, i'll just putthese cupcakes here. can i have some? no, you can't. even i haven't tasted it. get me soap and water immediately. what can i do for you? why are you late, ugly? in fairness with you, you'rethe only one who didn't notice. clean all of these. now.

what will i do with these papers?i'll gather or throw it? throw. then throw. okay, you're pretty. you look good. ugly, i'm hungry'- no! i bit it already. why did you touch that?

it's in my ref. and my house. so unless told otherwise, what's in there are all mine. i just place it there temporarily. sorry. finders keepers. losers suck. it tastes good. that's mine. - let go.- let it go! let it go.

look what you did. then just buy again. buy? those are special. those are made for a special person.you can't buy it. what do you want me to do? nothing. get out of my way. you're gonna kill me because of cupcakes? come here! eya! don't.

what is that? stop it. eya, stop it. what is your problem? why did you eat my cupcakes? i'll kill you. stop! you're going to hurt yourself. right. good evening, sir.

eya, you look different. i didn't know it's you. you look good. sir, i'm sorry. i can't take your son anymore. before he's justhalf human, half monster. now he's a 100% monster. i can't promise that i can take him nextbut thanks for the compliment. cross, come to my office. cross!

crazy! good for you. what happened? it's not important. i will let you leave if you tell me. it's just the stupid cupcakes. for you those are just stupid cupcakes. you know, not everyone are born like you. you have everything.

that's why sometimesyou don't put value... in simple things thatare priceless to others. i know what you mean. do you? these are special memorieswith your mother. look, they're priceless. but they're very special. now tell me, what will you doif someone tear it apart?

i hope you apologize to her. no poison, come on. out! out! hey, it's not gonna ring again. okay. get back! hurry. go, go! - mary... 0 mary!- shut up. i said shut up! who are you whispering with?

her. mary! where? move. wait. - move. i want to sleep now.- wait. arlene is on number 3. you on 7. good evenin, sir. i'll get your order. yes. one order of eya.

extra ugly. you're working here? what a coincidence... will you please leave? just so you can annoy someone, huh. go with him. i don? like. he gave me 5 thou. do you want me to give yousome portion of it.

what am i auntie? a ghq? do i have a cut on drinks? no. this is decent. he asked me permission.i gave him one. o? what do you want to happen? nothing. let's just eat. don't you like it? i do like. okay, i'll feed you.

plastic. i don't like. hey, i'm trying to be nice. for once. say ah... what the...? water! did you take drugs? i'm at peace here.and then you came to ruin it. come with me.

i resigned already. what did you say? what? can you be more sincere? eya, i'm sorry. come on. i'm gonna late. let's go. damn it. i left my planner in the room. what do you want? you'll goon your own or i'll come with you? i'll go alone.you might lock the door again.

feeling. keep quiet. boss, let's seal her mouth with a tape. brod, we don't have duct tape. i left it in the condo. hey pesky people who likes to pose. just shut her up. i don't know how you becamecross' girlfriend, ugly loud mouth. wow. you speak english.yet you left your duct tape.

and please can you take off your mask.i know who you are. i'm not cross' girlfriend. so please let me goand let's all forget this... - sit!- ouch! that hurts. this is not a joke. we kidnapped youto get even with cross. our girlfriends leftthe two of us because of him. if cross comes over here for you, we'll beat him 'til he gets ugly,and no one will like him anymore.

and i'll be the school's heartthrob. what? really? don't deny it. you've beenunder surveillance for a long time. we've asked someone tofollow you 'til you get to his house. - because... ouch!- hello! cross. - you don't know me but we have...- i don't know you... i don't talk to strangers. he put it down. i'm his personal maid that's whywe're always together.

so please? stop this drama. shut up! shut up!i can't think in here. - wait i'm thinking.- e ya! meow! eya? - what's that?- meow... they'll think that thereare cats here not persons. meow... meow...

to your back, chad! hurry! it's chad! let's take pictures. idol. easy. jump shot. one, two, three... okay. fist bump! hey, chad. i might take all your...

you can come oui how. i'm presentable. you know, you are so... sorry. my abs might have startled you. sir snacks. thank you, manang. here, have some snacks. i baked this. really? did you bake this?

it's for lory. but she told me to stopchasing her already. she wouldn't like me. it's cross that she really likes. what's wrong with me? you're gorgeous. good soccer player. great baker. friendly, kind. if i were lory, i'd choose you.

i even got a big crush on you. so what's your plan? don't be sad. that's the way it goes.we can't always get what we want. h feels good to have an illusion. but you'll get tired eventuallywith all the fantasies. sometimes you haveto wake up with reality. chad is so cute. if we weren't having thisplatonic relationship, i'd court him.

he's crying? what's this ? e verytime i havea bed scene with boys, it's either they threw upon me or they're crying. yes, best friend? i'm gonna tell you something. but don't get mad or irritated, okay? can you please sit properlyco'z i can see your panty. i'll just wear my skirt. sorry. this is my house.

i can do what i want. don't touch me. let me go! i always wanted to do this. - no!- let her go! you can't kiss her. chad, you're my hero! because you should be kissing me. hold her fight.

man-mg, when are you doing'? whoever you are, leave eya's body. leave! manang, i was just dreaming.this is not exorcist, manang. that's what they always say. don't, manang. no! oh no, when cross is being nice,you can be in... i don? know. ma, pa, do you know...

your daughter is flirting. i've met a few friends in willford. lory, then chad... he's my crush but i got to forget itco'z i know i don't stand a chance. cross is like a monster. he's annoying and cruel. a snob. his good side is that heknows now how to say sorry. he's weird when he's scared of the ghost.

really? - it's raining. come on.- jesus. let's go! my bag! - come on.- let's go. let's go. here. - here. where are you going?- here. the rain ruined my moment. because you're ugly. where's your car?

i asked the driver for an errand. what is that? then call him. i left my charger in the car. your cellphone? i don't have load. you're getting a big salaryyet you're still poor. i'm visiting my mom's grave. does her remains lie in here, too? are you crying?

that's rain. you're crying. look. yes. i feel sad. i miss my mom. when she died, i cried a lot. that's why i'm so destructive. that's why i feel so angry. maybe that's why i'm punishingeveryone because i'm miserable. i want everyone to be like me.

true. what's that? what are you doing? so you'd feel warm. that's wet too. so you'd be a bit warm. there. body heat. i don't like. come here. come here.

you might get sick. dad would have to spend money for you. don't act up. you're not pretty. ifs okay 10 be ugly if pdbe hugging someone like him. h makes me feel pretty big time. you look pretty. are you looking for cross? what? no.

you, too. you don't want to admit it. really. he's in the stock room. with miss uk. lory? why'd you know that? lory asked for my helpso they'd be close. so there, i locked them up. are you jealous? no. i even want to help lory.

let's go check them out. slow down. listen. cross, i love you. sorry but i'm already in a relationship. with whom? with eya. no. no. no. eya told me it was a joke.

she told me the truth. she told me that you just said thatso the girls would get mad at her. no. it's really true. i already love her. i always want to see her. stop. even in my dreams. wait, i'll open this. i don? believe you.

- hurry.- ouch. i'll take care of her. why did you tell her that? i can't think of any wayso she'd stop chasing me. hey, don't react like you'rethe one who's embarrassed. don't you really like her? you're stubborn. weren't you the one whowant to push her with chad. i thought you're the lorhad villain.

lorhad. lory, chad. lorhad. whatever. i'm tired. hello, i'm busy. go to the wedding booth. now. okay, wait.i'll just frighten one more. wait. hello. do you want to haveyour team lorhad succeed? jesus! you're good even without costume.you're still scary.

you asked me to go herejust to be insulted at. you wanna make this convincing? let's get married. i can? understand what he wants. but ifs okay. in the name of love. forced? me? no. before we get married, fix your face.

choosy. do you, cross sandford, take rea rodriguezas your lawfully wedded wife? i do. you may now kiss the bride. hey you, don't take advantage. you should take advantage. for sure lory's out there.looking. she'll catch you. for the sake of art andin the name of love. more.

you can use me as your tissue right now. feel free to blow your noseor wipe your tears on me. i don't care if you throw methe trash when you're done. as long as i'm useful to you, lory. just let me wipe your tears. i saw cross and eya kiss. chad, they're a couple. that hurts. lory, trust me when i tell you,i know how it feels. i really do.

just go away. - you can't do anything to help me.- lory... it's okay. i'm here, lory. lory, it's okay. i'm here for you, lory. it's okay. you're crying harder than lory, huh. oh ma'am sorry, you can't.there's a line... you're all oa. party poop“-

eya. eya, are you in-love with cross? why are you asking? answer me first. are you in-love with cross? yes, lory. i love cross. i'm hurt, eya. i felt bad with what i sawin the marriage booth. but you know what?

it made me realize one thing. that i look stupid. i'm waiting for someonewho will never ever like me. then i saw chad. chad's there for me. cares for me. do you think i should give chad a chance? you know, the two of youlook good together, promise. i'll give chad a chance.

as long as you promiseto take care of cross for me. why is there a lot of oas here? good luck to us. thank you, best friend. let's go? hi! i'm going crazy. i think i should describethis feeling as love. i've never felt this way before. can you really fall forsomeone you love to hate?

i don't know. i'm not sure about myself anymore. for once i wanna be honest. do the right thing. there's something i have to tell you. l... i like you. what if you smell him? then lookfor the one who smells like him. you're gross.

well, i hope this helps. we'll go look find him. how many matched? 4 shoes. not one for the voice. then choose. the voice of whomi talked with last night is different. are we done, sis? why do we have that? hello?

hello, e ya. this is adrian. hi! how did you know me? i've actually been stalking youever since the start of the sem... i know i goi chicken outbut i found the strength... to actually expressmy feelings to you at the ball... co'z i have the mask. i like you. it's you. fm afraid you might not like me.

can i meet you after class. alright. yes, hello. hello, e ya. where are you? ah adrian, hold on. - wait.- okay. can you go here atthe student council room? i can't. why?

are you gonna look for that boy firstthan your job that pays you? i'm going home. i got lbm. there are a lot of crs here. my butt isn't used to them. hello, adrian, sorry about it. my friend is so pesky. he keeps on calling me. no problem.so i'll meet you after school. okay, see you. bye.

thank you lord. this is it. this is real. finally, somebody's gonna love me. i can finally be happy. hey; eva' i'm adrian. hey, adrian. i'm cross. are you really eya's partner? do you have doubts?

so then, who's her partner? not you. stop it. stop it. this is but my only chance tofeel happy and you want to ruin it. alright guys. i give up. i can? do this anymore. it's not me. ian made me do it. to make him feel jealous.

and to make him tell the truth. so just let me go, i won't bea big mh to the two of you. the voice is different. i got sore throat that night. i got colds. after it rained, remember? i can't explain but... why do you have this? what would you expect me?leave it lying around the house?

you read it? read the last page. i know what's written here. i'm the one who's writing here. read it. hey diary of the ugly e ya. it's morning and! can't sleep. co': eya's my partnerin the midnight party... i know she was the girl behind the mask.

my heartbeat went fast. this is weird but... why am i like this? maybe this started when wegot together in the hospital. or at the student council room. i always want to be with her. see her. talk to her. and as days go by,my feelings for he! get stronger.

i was able to tell herwhat i feel at the ball. she's not my type. she's not even pretty. but she makes my world beautiful. damn b... i like her. hey, ugly, speak up. listen. are you better offwriting your fantasies? or do you want to give a chance...

our true feelings. a... e... i... o... u... eya, will you be my girlfriend? life is like a book. or maybe a diary.

ifs in your handshow you want to end h.

Wednesday, December 28, 2016

the diary of a teenage girl film


hello schoolgirl is a simple,cute love story that centers around therelationships of four individuals, who seem to be separatedfrom one another by a certain difference in ageand on a social level. this film tells the storyof two students who meet in an introductoryarchitecture class and fall in love. fifteen years later, the girltracks down her first love to seek his help in buildingher dream house. this is a story of an ardent first loveand the friendship of 5 people.

led by the letter thatcomes from 23 years ago, the story takes place inone summer vacation in 1991, crossing the past and present. in this film a regular teenager anda pretty and popular girl start dating. their young love is theobject of much jealousy from all the other students, but for them, it just seemssplendid and eternal. that is until the boy finds out something tragic aboutthe girl he loves.

hot young bloods depicts theloves, rivalries, and friendships between four high schoolstudents in hongseong county, south chungcheong provincein the 1980s. in this film a teenage girltries to continue her normal social and school life, after her grandfather forcesher into an arranged marriage with a man in his twenties. in this film an arroganthigh school student who stands to inherita fortune when he is 18

suddenly discovers the clausein his grandfather's will that he must graduatefrom a small high school in rural kangwon province. he has no choicebut to transfer there. in this new school, he meets a girlwho changes his life forever. this film tells the story of a girl who moves to the countrysidewith her mother and sister. she has a lung ailment which is whytheir doctor recommended the move. soon after movinginto their new home,

the family discoversa wild boy living in the barn. wanting to help,the family takes him in and soon a relationshipbegins to form between the girl and the boy. "my sassy girl" tells the storyof an engineering student who meets a drunkengirl on a train. she is his type but she'salso repulsively drunk. because a fellow passengermisunderstands their relationship he winds up taking care of her.

and somehow he alsowinds up in jail with her. in this film, a young universitystudent finds a secret box filled with her mother'sletters and a diary. reading it, she learns of hermother's first love affair, a story which closely matches herown experience at the university.

Tuesday, December 27, 2016

teenage girls diary


a bullet journal is simply a customizable organization system on a notebook. you basically create your own planning layouts, and inserts, according to your needs. all you need is a bit of creativity and a notebook. bullet journaling was created be ryder carroll an art director and interaction designer

living in brooklyn, ny. you can find more about him in the link provided in the description box. you just need a notebook of your choice and a pen. classic bullet journals normally have a black, hard cover and have grid/squared or dotted paper. you can, however, chose any kind of paper you like. i recommend using a moleskine notebook because they are durable and are guaranteed to last for the entire year. traditional journaling takes more time

and is more complex altogether. bullet journaling is based on bullet form journaling. a simple language, easy to log and simple to keep track of. generally, a bullet journal starts with an index. this is one or two pages dedicated to organize the actual and future contents of your bullet journal so you can quickl reference back to them. of course, this means either numbering all of your pages,

or using a sort of color coding system to keep track of the contents of your bullet journal. since a bullet journal is a planning tool, you can create your spreads according to your level of planning detail. some people prefer daily spreads, others prefer weekly or monthly spreads. if you want, you can just throw all of these together in your journal for a more complete planning system or stick with just one of them.

after saving up some space to draft your log entries, you can start thinking about specific spreads. these are a group of pages entirely dedicated to organize one subject. you can create fitness spreads, where you keep track of your workouts, you can create tables to keep track of your expenses you can save a few pages to plan for social media and so on. it's up to you and the things you need to plan in your life. mark these, and add them to your index for quick referencing.

i still use the original bullet method and i think it's the simplest and the best. mainly, everything that you track in your bullet journal should be in bullet form. simple sentences that are straight to the point. this means that you can create task lists or event logs that have all the information you need before your eyes, without excessive wording or phrasing.

a task is represented by a "." when you finish that task, you simply transform you "." into a "x" if you don't think you'll be able to finish that task the day you've written it down, just use ">" to migrate that task for the following day. a date related event, like a birthday, is maked with an "o" notes are represented with a "--"

this is the basic system, but be free to use other symbols to keep track of your tasks your own way. if you're curious about the backstory of the bullet journal, visit the original website and explore the original concept and the basic rules of bullet journaling. if you aren't subscribed yet to my channel feel free to do so! i am going to upload a bullet journal setup very soon so you can see how i adapt the original method to my own liking.

thank you for watching! bye!

Monday, December 26, 2016

Friday, December 23, 2016

teenage girl diary entry


- galleycat?- gawker. - slut.- he's been out twice already. - thanks. jack bauman's office. oh, hi, morgan. yeah, i'm sure he did read them.um, i did. i thought it was amazing work. - so glad you could make it. if you've got a minute,let's go through my day.

- you know, i'm sure that hewould love to talk to you, uh, but he's in a meetingright now. - and don't forgetto change my shrink appointment. - got it. - oh, um, i need you to manageanother release for me. - there's nothingscheduled for months. - it's for the e-bookof "waking eyes." we're tying inthe new edition. - i thought that wascoming out next fall.

- a spot opened upon "charlie rose." we're moving it up. - oh. - i thought you'd bethe perfect person for the job. - what? - well, your fatheris milan's agent, right? - yeah, but--- they sent me the arcs. get a list from publicity.let's put our heads together. alice?

all right, look,i know it's not glamorous, but i'm puttingmy trust in you. "waking eyes" is the best selleron our backlist. all right, all right, look, what if--what ifi read that manuscript you've beenhounding me about, hmm? - you will?- yeah, what's the girl's name? - karen malone.- yeah, karen. - malone.- okay.

- it's the best thing thati've read since i've been here. - i said i'd read it. - okay, but we have to hurry because there might besome interest-- - yes, alan mitchell,please. he's busy?ah. well, fuck him. no, i don't wantto leave a message. - so you'll readthe manuscript this week? - yes.

- hey. you're doingthe "waking eyes" release? - did you knowthey were moving it up? - yeah. that's the bookthat made me love books. i totally identifiedwith her. didn't you? - well, these are friendsof my wife. - nice to meet you.

- they've justcome over from some... hey, sport. you having a good time? - sure.- say hi to everyone. - hi. - alice wrote a terrificshort story last week. she's gonna bethe real deal. oh, this is milan daneker. this is my daughter, alice.

- it's a pleasureto meet you. - milan is one of your mother'sundiscovered writers, but he's writtena book, a good book, and i'm goingto make sure it sells. - yes, please.- yes. - you got to meet annette... - all right.- "times book review." lay a littleof that foreign charm on her. - "she dodged the forced laughter

and the vapid conversations." "if she could just"-- - oh, sorry. i-i was just looking around,and, um... - it's okay. - can i? really? so how is it to grow uplike this? - uh...

it's a little lonely. - that's what i thought, yes. yeah. and you'rea writer too, yes? - um... i don't know. - i would liketo read your story. - it's nothing. - why don't youlet me decide?

well, i-i must-- okay. - "if she could just make herself small enough"... "completely unremarkable"... - hi. sorry. - here she is,late as usual. mwah. we were just discussingthis new film with, um... what's his name?

flavor of the month--you know who i mean. - oh, yeah, yeah.- yeah. have you seen it? - yeah, sadie and i went to seeit last weekend, actually. - mm-hmm. and? - we--we kind of enjoyed it. - i thoughtyou were smarter than that. did you know alicewon a scholastic writing award when she was 16?

- really?- we'd like to order now. what'll you have, sport? oh, get the beef cheeks. they're fabulous here. she'll have the beef cheeks.and you? - pasta puttanesca. - oh, i'll havethe puttanesca. you havethe grilled chicken. maya? - she'll havethe grilled cheese.

- no, no,a half order of calamari and some fries for her. yeah.make it a whole order. kids love fried stuff. here's to you, pal. - oh.what are we celebrating? - independent booksellerslove the book. word of mouth is fantastic.- thank you. - congratulations.- thank you very much.

- oh, i lovewatching you eat. - i know, i know.- you must. you invite him to dinnerevery night. - anna. - that looks great. - so here's to me. i discover talented writers,develop them for years, and then you steal themaway from me. - anna, you told me to geta new agent.

- we're getting some great pressin the trades. milan is making headwayon the next one, right? - mm.- right? - yes.- i'm talking to you. - you're drunk. - fuck you. - your command of the englishlanguage is astonishing. - i thinkyou said that already. - cursing was one of the firstwords i knew in english.

- really?who taught you? - the kid next door. - excuse me.i'm going to go freshen up. - delicious, huh?mmm. - delicious.- mmm, mmm. how's yours? - come over here. - hello.- hello. i'm here to see jack bauman.

- oh, yes. go right in.- okay, thank you. - oh, shit. - oh, my god, look at you. hey. - uh, what are youdoing here? - i just finished my first draftof my new book, so i'm here to deliver it. - what, are you kidding?we would've sent someone. - it's better in person,isn't it?

- congratulations. finally,something worth reading. - thank you.- come into my office. - it's been far too long. - hey, where'd you go?- i'm coming. i'm coming. - so is it done?- finally. - great. alice, where's my lunch? - oh, uh,chez louis, 1:00 p.m.

- if i'd knownyou were gonna drop by... - but maybe i could have lunchwith alice. - what?- to celebrate. - i--actually, i can't.i've got-- - you have to eat.- i really need-- - you could toss aroundsome marketing ideas. - i--you know what?um... - she'd love to. - please?

how are you? - good, good. good. so you're organizing the releaseof the new edition, yes? ironic, huh? - it's nice. tell me about your day. you know...school. how was yours?

- you know, writing. i'm glad you could meet me. thank you very much. when can i read your story? - it's, like, no big deal. they, um--they just printed it 'cause no onereally submits stuff, and, um... um, they'rekind of desperate.

- come on. this line here is exactlyhow it feels like the first time you see someonethat you maybe love. it's, uh... you're a writer. what about your writing? - i'm mostly not. - that's a shame.

- i read your new bio. it says thatyou're teaching a lot. - yes, i enjoy it. - i'm sure. - you were my firstand best student. - i got to go. - alice, i've missed you. - why don't you just say,"hey, about that little thing "that happened 15 years agothat you never owned up to

"or apologized forlike you should have, you motherfucker"--sorry, tyler. - okay, i should neverhave told you. look, it's not a big deal. - but he hurt you, ali. you don't do publicityfor someone who hurt you. - it's my job. - i thought your jobwas to help find and edit new and wonderful novels.

- tell that to jack.- why don't you? - will you help me? - besides the fact that i thinkit's a terrible idea, what could i do? - you're a successfulweb designer. - alice. - okay, fine. you'rea semi-successful web designer whose best friendthinks she's brilliant. - yeah, who gave upher not-so-stellar career

to be a mommy. - i need to build moreof a web presence for the book. - oh, that's a great idea. - sadie, please,don't make me do this alone. - you're a real shit,you know that? thank you. all right, i need to goand wrangle a radio spot. yay. - we didn't get to talk

about what you want to dofor your birthday. - hide in a closetuntil it's over. - you better havea big closet. - you promised. come here, buddy.give me a hug. i got to go. hugs. - alice, why are you always running off somewhereyou don't want to go? - oh, fuck off.

sorry, tyler. all right.- bye. call me later. - i will. - you want some? - hello? "it was a gracefulpas de deux, "a dance of hate. "he belittles her,two, three. she yells, two, three."

- hello? - it's me. this is the new story. so, uh, i'm not really sureabout the ending. it feels really forced, and to me, the dialogueis really bogus. - so... do you have a pen? - i can't watch.

- is that your homework? - uh, yeah. i have, like,100 pages of american history. - come over here, kiddo. come, let's read together. it's good.- you made notes all over it. - i wouldn't botherif it wasn't good. but it can be better. it's too abstract. it's, um...

so it only becomes real... if you give itconcrete details, concrete details. look, here. if you move that one... here we go. - okay, so who has materialto hand out for next class? - i need one morevolunteer. - i brought in some new pages.

- um, alice? - i had this reallyradical idea for this super weaponthe xorgots are gonna use to destroy planet earth.just wait till you-- - it doesn't haveto be complete. maybe we could giveyou some--some ideas or... - well,if she doesn't have anything-- - i'm sorry. - okay, josh,what are those aliens up to?

- oh, my-- look at that view. it's beautiful. come. so tell meabout your day. school. - school? - uh, it's the same every day--totally boring. - oh, not for me. you know,for me, it's like a movie--

cheerleaders, boysin team jackets, holding hands. - no.- no? - mm-mm. um, peopledon't hold hands anymore. they just hook up. - they hook up?- mm-hmm. - they hook up. - and, uh,no cheerleaders. no, wait.i guess we do have uniforms.

- uniforms?- mm-hmm. - yeah, yeah. - my best friend, ruby,just went goth. - she turned what?- goth. - goth?- mm-hmm. - goth?- uh-huh. well, what-- - you know, like, uh--like, uh, black eyeliner and ripped shirts.- oh, yeah?

- and, uh, her mom wouldfreak out if she knew, so, she, um--she hides her stuffin the hallway every day before she leaves.- uh-huh. - and, uh, um...- yeah? uh...- and, yeah? - you--you want to hearabout this? - oh, yeah, yeah. - um, well, she says her momhas no idea who she is anymore, but maybe she never did.

so thursday's a good dayfor you? - i guess so.- okay. see you next thursday, then. - i'm sorry, guys. i know you're wastingprecious babysitter time. i just want to eatin front of the tv and get sodden and pathetic. - it is your day.we will do whatever you want. - thank you.

together:surprise! - i knew you were gonnamake us bring you home. - thank you. aww.i'm going to kill you. - happy birthday. you're really going to enjoy itonce you get used to the idea. - come on.- come on, help her blow it out. - one, two, three. - ooh, a little bit more.oh, oh. yay. one more, one more.- last one.

- whoo! - what you writing? - my journal. - i want to know you. - i can't. - one page. - okay. my heart is pounding. i have to get up.

a kiss. a real one. - oh, sorry.- no, that's okay. i was just--i was reading. sorry. do you need--- no, no. i-i was just lookingfor a place to hide out. - my friend invited me. i don't even know the girlwho this is for. yeah?- yeah.

- well, happy birthday.- shh. i'm trying to pretendlike i don't have to grow up. - is there anythingi can do to help? - maybe. - looks good. - so what are you reading? oh. i love that character. the female holden caulfield.

- yeah,that's what they say. - not a favorite? - no. - so why are yousitting alone in a bathroomon your birthday reading it? work. - what do you do? - that is notan age-appropriate question. - you're right.i'm sorry.

- want some? - definitely. oh, emmett. what? - you were right.i did have a good time. i'm glad. - hey.- hey. - thanks for inviting me. - wait. you twoknow each other?

- uh, he was rob'sfreshman year roommate, but i actually met him first... freshman mixer. - oh, right. - you're kidding.- no. - okay. college, wow. let me help you up.- thank you. can i help with the cleanup? - no, no, no.

we got this.you've done enough. - you recycle? - uh, i plead the fifth. what about your mom? - she stayed home with us. do you have sponges? - uh, uh... sorry. - yeah, they've been married35 years,

sometimes happily,sometimes not. they're abnormally normal. - wow. you're, like, some kindof almost extinct species. they should breedyou in captivity. - so, aside from not beingenvironmental activists, what's your family like? not much like a family, i guess. - and?

- nuts. - oh, that explains it. thanks. - look,just so we're clear, i don't really do nuts. - i'll keep that in mind. how do you take your coffee? - black. - i'll call you later?

- so, while he was buildinga bionicle, i posted on new yorker books,paris review, galleycat. uh, what else?- how am i gonna thank you? - oh, i don't know.foot massage? not too high, ty. - so alice grew upand became a wife and motherjust like everybody else. isn't that sad? but it would make me sadderif she hadn't.

your face is chapped. when you're near 30,you have to moisturize. trust me. - kissing. - too much kissing. - never say thatto a married person. emmett.- yeah, i guessed. look at you.- what? - i'm so glad.

- it's terrifying.- and exhilarating. - mom?- what is it, baby? - jesus christ.- mom? - alice.- dad. - i forgot i need a jacketfor this thing tonight. here, this was in the middleof the living room. - it's not mine. - well, where the helldid it come from? god, it reeks.

- i think it's milan's. - milan's? - he was herethis afternoon. - did he bring bya new draft? - he, uh--he came to see me. - you? he's been helping mewith my writing. - what?wha-- since when?

- a while. - well... you couldn't havea better mentor. you're a lucky girl. - i expect great thingsof you. - good night. - okay, here. so this lady,she hasn't voted in 20 years. she starts reading our mostoutrageous quotes of the day,

sees her senator waxing poetic about the benefitsof hydrofracking. immediately promisesto volunteer for anyonewho will run against him. - wow.- and this guy--oh, my god. i love the waythey curse in the south. - you do realizeyou're a fanatic, don't you? - yeah, sorry.- mm. - you, uh--you want someof my pakora?

- yes, i want to tryyour pakoras. - i approved your entry,so you can post it anytime. i'm the last one here,so i'm gonna head out. see you tomorrow.- bye. - bye. thank you.- bye. - it's nice to knowsomebody who actually likeswhat they do. i always wanted to be a writerwhen i grew up. - are you?

- grown up? - no, writing. - how come? - i sit there waiting to hearthe characters speak, and instead,i have this voice in my head, saying, "this is shit.this is shit. this is shit." - come on, that voice? everybody hears that voice. it's the same voicethat says,

"i can't believe you just saidthat, you fucking moron." - you think? most people just ignore it. - really?i just... succumb. - yeah? i like a girlwho knows how to succumb. - really? - really.

- shit. - ah. well, good morning. this the new jacket copy?- yeah. - great.- i thought that you-- - can you get harold blakefor me? - did you get a chanceto read karen's manuscript? - uh-huh.not yet. the fisher book's exploding.

- but you will this week. - as soonas i get a free moment. now, milan did an interviewwith the press office. can you see if he said anythingwe haven't heard before? - this week? - i'm sorry?- this week. - oh, yes, of course. i really need to talkto harold. - harold's on line one.

"the only real ruleof good writing is generosity." - rule number one--generosity. you must be willingto share yourself. oh, i brought you a present.- you did? it's a birthday present. i wrote you a poem. - i didn't knowyou write poetry. - i don't,but you inspire me, so... - what do you think?

- uh, it's--it's--it's nice. - "nice"? - i have a--i havea precalc test tomorrow. jesus, i hate this stuff.- alice? - okay.i'm glad you liked the poem. - anything we can use? - nothing that wehaven't heard before. - damn. get me susanat simon & schuster.

- sorry. - so are you ever on time? - no.but, um... i got you these. - oh, wow.alfred marks began working at the white houseat the age of 28. good for alfred. louise van der zwan-- okay, stop.- all right, stop.

- is this what you doevery sunday morning? you just sit hereand envy other people's lives? - no, that is pretty mucha full-time occupation. - you knowit's pointless, right? - yes, i do. you can't write in front of me.- what? - no, i'm serious. if anyone'sgonna write in my apartment, it's going to be me. - but you don't.

- thank youfor pointing that out. - come on, it's notlike there's a finite number of words in the room, and if i use them all, there won't be enoughleft for you. - why does everything you sayhave to make so much sense? it's fucking infuriating. - okay, shut up now. - seeinganyone special, sport?

- not really. - you know,having children is the most satisfying thinglife has to offer. - how's the writing going? - oh, you know... there is a book that i readthat i thought was terrific. - yeah?- yeah, i'm trying to get jack to read it. - um, well, i thought thatmaybe you would have a look.

maybe you'd wantto meet with the writer. - jack hasn't read it? - don't worry about that.i'll get him to read it. i just--i just thoughtyou might want to meet with her. her name's karen malone.she, um--she did "iowa." she has this amazingshort story. - no, no.i'm going to call him up. - no, dad. please don't.that's not what i meant. - well, i can fix it,sport.

- dad, dad,i'll get him to read it. i just wanted your opinion. - dad, i mean it.don't call him. - okay, honey,i won't call him. hey, tiger. are you having fun?huh? - great work. um, alice,can you hang out a minute? look, do you want meto refund your tuition?

- it's pastthe official deadline, but i could ask themto make an exception. - it's notthat i'm not trying. - why don't you sign up againwhen you feel like you're ready? yeah, i know he's doing a lotof press right now, but it would be greatif he could squeeze in the "waking eyes"re-release party. okay, no, i don't haveany confirmations yet, but... i can hold.

- is thisjack bauman's office? - yeah,is he expecting you? - karen malone. - karen, hi. i'm alice.- nice to meet you. it's really niceto meet you too. - so could you tell himi'm here? - hey, karen,come on in. - hi.- jack bauman.

- so nice to meet you.- pleasure to meet you. - alice. hi.- dad? - am i late? see, sport,i told you i'd fix it, huh? can i take you to lunchwhen we're through here? - ben, good to see you.- hey. - hi.- karen. - how are you?- all right. - hi.- hi.

- uh, keith. i'm watching tyler. - oh, okay. - we were at the park all day.he's taking a nap. - um, i'm alice.- yeah, um, hi. - sadie's at, uh,prenatal yoga. um, she'll be back in,like, an hour and a half. - maybe you could just tell herthat i came by. she could call me.- yeah, sure.

you know what? actually, maybei'll just check on tyler, if that's okay.- yeah, sure. come on in. - he's such a great kid.- yeah. i--we read this in my, uh,modern lit class last year. - oh? - i didn't finish it. - well, you can have that copyif you want. - it's kind of dated. - keith?

what the fuck are you doing? - uh, what are youdoing home? - i decided to skipdeep relaxation. is there someone in there? - keith,get out of here. um...you owe me 40. - now.- okay. - what the hellare you doing? - i don't know.

- he's a kid.- i know. - if tyler had woken up,oh, my god, he would've been so confused.- i know. - what about emmett?- i know, i know. - hey, honey.- mama? - yeah, baby? - aunt alice! - aunt alicehas to leave now. - still waitingon that updated guest list.

- i'm working on it. you could have told me that youread it, that you liked it. - that we're publishing it. - you are? - i thought daddywould've spread the word. - well, who are youassigning it to? - i'm editing it myself. - it's notyour kind of book. - eh.

- i found her. i-- - alice, that's your job. you cull the good stuff.i decide if it's good enough. - yeah, but listen,i have some great ideas-- - shh. now, listen, there's noway i'm going to let an inexperienced editor workwith an inexperienced writer. - i've worked herefor two years. - and how many bookshave you edited? - my point exactly.

- i will cc you in my notes. you can come to me withyour thoughts anytime you like. now, listen, milan is expectingyou at the taping tomorrow. the new novelis almost unreadable. make sure he sticksto "waking eyes," okay? you're the best. - so 15 years.- mm-hmm. - you've written seven novelssince "waking eyes," and none has becomethe kind of cultural icon.

- no, unfortunately not. - what do you think makes it so perennially popular? what i think it is, is thateveryone has been a teenager, and... we all know how out of kilterit makes you. - all right.is it-- okay, so are you gonnatell me the secret now? - all right, i thinki'm gonna actually tell you.

come here for a second. no one can hear this,actually. mm. - i have to go. - so go. - it's not important. - so the questioni have to ask... - which i probably have answeredmany times before, so go ahead. - possibly.

how does a man in his 40s perfectly capturethe essence of a teenage girl? this opening paragraphis self-indulgent. 95% of writing is rewriting. you know that. and here, here'sanother dangling preposition. the way you manglethe english language is-- look at this.i'm the immigrant here.

- i was hanging outwith my friend. i forgot. i'm sorry. i do this because i believein your talent. - i know. - come here. i do thisbecause i love you. - i know.- yeah. - i met a boy. - oh, i'm happy.

so glad. i want you to be happy. what can i doto make you happy? we all like a mystery, but there'sno mystery girl in it. it's all fiction, at that time,i did walk around in the city and listen in on subways,coffee shops... - mm-hmm.- streets, you know,

and i still do,now and then, listen in to seeif girls have changed. you know?- hmm. and have they? - some things never change. - special delivery. - what the hellare you doing here? no, no,you need to go. i have somebody coming here.- another time? - no, no.

- why? - look, i just turned 29.- really? - and i guess itmessed with my head. shit. - hey.- hi. - this is keith. - uh, he'ssadie's babysitter. - you her husband?- yeah. - keith was just leaving.

- yeah, um... sorry, man. - i got us some wine. - alice? - i went to sadie's the otherday, and i forgot that. - well, i told himthat he could borrow it. - before or afteryou forgot it? - emmett. - did you...?

fuck. - emmett, can--can we just talk about it? please, it was the daythat i found out about the manuscript. i was really upset. i am never gonnato see this guy again. emmett. listen, let's justtalk about it. emmett. - i will not let you make meas crazy as you are.

- dad?- hey, champ, come. come and meet alana. - you must be alice.- hi. - sit, sit, sit, sit. alana isa fantastic conductor. women are really cominginto their own in that field. - what about maya, dad? - i'm gonna see her.yeah. helene just needs a little timeto cool down.

- oh, dad. - hey, hey. you know how it is,right? - sorry. i just, uh... suddenly startedto just feel-- - alice?- excuse me. - what are you doing here? - i brought food. - you know how precious sleepis to me.

- i need to talk.sadie-- - emmett is my friend,and keith is our neighbors' kid. - look, i'm sorry.- good. - i brought dulce de leche. - you know i love youmore than almost anyone, except tyler and roband my mother...sometimes. but i'm startingnot to like you very much... and i'd neverforgive you for that. i need to not see youfor a while.

what about the book? - screw you, alice. - you know what?i-- can we just--can we just not? - i'm really tired. - no, i don't--i don't think so. - we did things.- "things"? - things. - you hooked up.

- was it wonderful? it should be wonderful.was it? - mm... - please,tell me about it-- come on,how it was like. did he make you come? i want to make you come. i want to be first personto make you come. come here.

look at me. don't close your eyes. open your eyes. that's not the waywe do it. - look at me. it's just something that i do,that i've always done. i see that lookin a guy's eyes, like he wants me. it's the only thingthat makes me feel real.

- i want you. - so? - so it wears off. like... i start wondering,"what's wrong with this guy? why can't he do better?" - that is unbearably sad. - but i probably can. give me a hug.

- i got a hose.- cool. - it's an ambush. - where's my hat?i need to be protected. - here you go. - i can't not be your friendfor one more day. - with friends like you... honey, be careful. - i figure if even youcan't put up with me, i'm gonna have to dosomething about it.

- yeah, you better. - aunt alice,emergency, emergency! you're on fire!- i am? - say "help"! - help. um, hi.my name is alice harvey. i am a volunteerfor people for the people, and i'm calling you because... this is suchan important election,

and it's so importantthat you-- hello? - hey, you made it. - of course. - come on in. hi, nice to meet you. - hi.- thanks for coming. everyone, listen up. let's takea little five-minute break.

put your phones down. this is emmett grant, who foundedpeople for the people. he is the guythat got us all here tonight. whoo-hoo! - i didn't get you here.you got yourselves here. everybody take a lookaround the room. i forgot to thank our hostessfor this evening. did you look around?

it's a roomfull of people, right? see, we reached out to you. tonight you're here. you're reaching outto others, and then with any luck, those others aregonna reach out on election dayand fill in the right bubbles, and maybe together, we can changethe political landscape.

if not... we can because it'sthe reaching out that matters. it's the reaching out thatscares the shit out of them, even when our guys don't win. so please, please, just keep reaching out. thank you.- whoo-hoo. - yeah!- awesome. that was a really nice speech.

- i should have known.- listen, i love you both. - you've gotabout five minutes. - how could you use this eventfor personal reasons? - that's not fair. i wanted to help you. i knowhow important this is to you. - keep calling. - emmett-- - no, actionshave consequences, alice. - hey, we got to move on.

- i'm reaching out. - please, please, please, just keep reaching out. - what would you like,sport? - i'd like to startwith the arugula salad, please. - you know, the duckis fabulous here. you should try it.- and i'd like the filet. - why don't you bring herthe duck? milan... you want to tell them?

- it's all your doing. - bullshit. bookseller preorders for"waking eyes," unbelievable. we may have a best selleron our hands. - oh.- you're a genius, pal. - hayworth'smarketing department is. - okay,so we're all geniuses. - please pass the rolls. - sylvio is good,

but not if he doesn't havesomething great to sell. - could you passthe rolls, please? - would you just stopkissing each others' asses and enjoy the moment? - do you have to beso crude? - do you have to beso smug? - i'm happy. not that you'd have any ideawhat that feels like. - mm-hmm.i wonder why.

- actually, i'd liketo stick to the filet. - okay, sport. and duck for meand a side of spinach. so can anybody explain to methe appeal of that--that--that guyin that movie. oh, jeez, you know the one,the one that won best picture. - i can messenger a copyover today. yes, i will hold. hi.um, one second.

uh, yeah,i'll send it right over. okay, great.thanks. - my agent saidthat you gave him my book. - shit! - i'm not surei did you any favors. - i was actually working onsomething new before all this, and, um, i would loveif you could take a look. - it's my first chapter. - i-i'd love to.um...

- great.- thank you. - look into the camera. wave to the camera. - yes, greenstreetis coming. terrific.how many guests will that be? okay, great. - he's just finishing up a call.he should be right out. - could i take you to lunch? - sorry to make you wait.hot off the presses.

one for you.one for you. it's got the new dedication. - oh, that's great.- nice, huh? come in, come in. - "still she haunts me phantomwise, "alice moving under skies, never seen by waking eyes." - milan daneker-- he'll be readingfrom his new novel,

"waking eyes." mr. daneker. - thank you, martin.- mm-hmm. yes. "she was slouchingunder the weight "of a too-big book bag, "cracking her gum fiercely "like a line of defense. "but her eyes cried out,

'love me.oh, please, love me.'" "'a little lonely,'she said. "'my mom has no ideawho i am anymore, "but maybe she never did.' "she swayedwith a graceful pas de deux, "the dance of hate. "she was small enough. "she was invisible to themand always would be. "her eyes openedwider and wider

"as she came, brimming with surprise"... "pleasure,and ineffable sadness." alice, what is it? - i have to tellyou something. - fantastic night. - yeah, yeah.- you're a natural. - no, i was terrified.- you were great. wasn't he great?- mm-hmm.

yes,it went very well. - i can't believethat woman from the new york reviewof books was there. - she was interesting. - she was eatingout of your hand. - ben. - alice, um... your mothertold me what you said. - i had to.

- yes, i told himit wasn't true. - it isn't true?- it's what he said. i asked him.he said it's understandable. like i told him, you maybemisinterpreted it somehow. - is that what it is,alice? - i think it'swhat you wish were true. - alice?- stop the car. - it's perfectly naturalto have feelings for someone that you look up to.- i'm flattered.

- i really--i don't knowwhat to think anymore. - he said he may have useddetails from your life... - writers are magpies. - to make the charactermore real. - please stop the car! alice! what are you doing here? are you okay? are you all right?

oh, please, please. it's, um--- is this the new book? - whose life didyou appropriate this time? - no one. uh, well, there's bitsand pieces here and there. you know what i mean?yeah. - it was sucha long time ago. what...- alice. was such a long time ago?

concrete details. you must give me concretedetails to make it real. - i know at that age,little things seem enormous. - your warm... heavy arms around me... the smoky tasteof your tongue in my mouth. - i was helping you. - the feel of your hard-onagainst my thigh. - but nothing really happened.- yes, it did!

- yes, well, you seemedto enjoy it at the time. - you were oneof the few people who ever... actually seemed to see me... to make me feel realand important. - but you are.- you used me. - oh, come on.- you abandoned me. - alice--- you made me feel like i was nothingall over again. - not nothing.it's...

it's a beautiful character. and i've been livingin her shadow for 15 years. good-bye, milan. - hey, emmett. - what?did jeff screw up again? - no, i just gota google alert. - reaching out scares the shit out of them, even when our guys don't win. so please, please, please, just keep reaching out.

- because i love you. - gentlemen.how are we? where's alice? - i haven't seen her yet.sadie? where the hell is alice? - she had something betterto do. - what?- wait. who are you? - her best friend. are you ready to read,mr. daneker?

- i am. - walk this way. - some old lady with a slight beardlet me in. - mrs. rayburn. emmett... i'm sorry that i hurt you. - i might not be readyto take on the world, but i think...

that i can remember... to thinkabout one other person. - i'd like that to be you. - i'll think about it. - 100 was really good. - you're the girlin the book, aren't you? not anymore.

Thursday, December 22, 2016

secret diary of a teenage girl


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Wednesday, December 21, 2016

phoebe gloeckner diary of a teenage girl


with allison we really get inside that world. you go from the very very personal intimate detail really detailed, that's what people relate to "oh this is what she was like as a kid" and thisis you know looking at maps of pennsylvania thosekinds of specifics playing duets with her father onthe piano in the points of connection and you know what she wants to wear and allthose details help people get inside

a very specific experience and it moves from there out into the world. it's like knowing a life, it's life writing it's very vivid and you learn aboutyourself, you learn about other people from reading it. there's often those moments when you see sort of layers time or layers of generation all in oneframe and so you get a sense that something'sbeing handed to you in this kind of digestible nugget

but also invited to kinda go quiteliterally deep into each individual frame. it's obvious that she's like obsessive. she goes over things again and again in her head and she eventalks about her obsessions when she was a young kid like 10 or 12 and it's funny i mean i think so manycartoonists that i know they have this real attention to detail whether it's verbal or factual or details of events or images where it's like you experiencethings and you have to

in order to keep them alive andunderstand them you have to constantly be turning them around in your head. part of what's interesting about relationships in alison bechdel's work is the way, not only do different characters have relationships but there's relationships within onecharacter across time and there's something really interestingtout the way those characters are sort of thinking back on earlier versions ofthemselves and not just in some judgment oriented way

"oh i was young and i wish i knew better" but really reveling in moments a younger self realizedsomething. alison takes up a kind of space in the work that is not defensive that is expansive that opens windows so that lots of people can see themselves through this specifically lesbian story. she managed to examine her life

i think intellectually and her intellect gave voice to herheart in a sense and it's very powerful. all of her work takes really seriously that one's personal life and daily lifeis actually a way to make change and sothat's another reason i think of it as an important feminist intervention that probably could only happen through some sort ofpopular form like this. one of the things that was sogreat about dykes to watch out for

is that you could drop into it at any moment and understand what wasgoing on. they were and they remain sort of the one of the few culturalrepresentations of lesbian life as we've reallyexperienced it and it was amazing how in just a few short images, she could really capture a story in a sense of acommunity, in a sense of a world, in a sense of politics and i feel likeshe's made the world larger.

she's made the world larger and she's i think a huge imaginative gift to everyone that reads it. so alison i want to know what moe from dykes to watch out for is up to now i think if you were spice girl youwould be sporty spice not posh, not scary, but sporty spice am i right?

Tuesday, December 20, 2016

online diary for teenage girl


chapter 1: i am mia my name is mia thermopolis. i’m fourteen years old and i live in new york city. i live in an apartment in greenwich village, on the west side of the city. i live with my mom, helen, and my cat, fat louie. my mom is an artist. she paints pictures. i’m a freshman—a ninth grade student at albert einstein high school. my best friend is lilly moscovitz. lilly isn’t pretty but she’s very smart.

she is interested in politics and ecology. lilly writes reports about the people of new york and their problems. then she makes films of her reports. she has her own tv show—lilly tells it like it is. lilly’s mom and dad are doctors—they’re both psychoanalysts. psychoanalysts find out about people’s feelings. lilly has an older brother named michael. my parents never got married. they stopped loving each other before i was born. fourteen and a half years ago, they broke up their relationship.

my parents’ relationship ended, but they’re still friends. my dad doesn’t live in new york. he lives in a small country called genovia. it’s near the border of france and italy. my dad is an important person in the government of genovia. i visit my dad every christmas and summer. i stay with him and grandmere—my grandmother—in her house in france. i’m not very popular at school. i don’t have lots of friends. and i don’t have a boyfriend. no boy has ever asked me out on a date because i look strange. i look like a freak. i’m the tallest girl in my grade.

i have huge feet and very curly, light brown hair. i’m also very thin. i want to look like lana weinberger. lana weinberger is in my grade and she s beautiful. she has long blond hair and big gray eyes. lana is going out with josh richter. she’s dating the best-looking boy in the school. josh is really gorgeous! he has blond hair and blue eyes. he’s six feet tall and very good at sports. he’s a senior student. my mom gave me this diary. she told me to write down my feelings.

i don’t tell her my real feelings. that’s what she says. so she wants me to write them down. tuesday, september 23rd my mom’s right. i don’t tell her about my real feelings. i think about my feelings. but i don’t tell anyone about them. i’ve decided to write my feelings here in my diary. my mom is going out on a date with my algebra teacher, mr frank gianlnl! “i’m happy about this,” i told mom. but i’m not happy- there are about two million guys in manhattan.

she could go out with any of them. why does she want to go out with my school’s algebra teacher? wednesday, september 24th i told lilly about my mom and mr gianini. “mr gianini is ok,” said lilly. “he’s nice and his classes are easy.’’ lilly’s good at algebra. she doesn’t have to work hard in algebra classes. but i’m flunking algebra—i fail every algebra test. every afternoon, after school finishes, i have to do extra algebra.

that’s how mr gianini met my mom. he asked her to come to the school. “mia is flunking algebra,” he told her. “she needs to do extra work.’’ then he asked my mom out on a date, “i don’t understand you, mia,” said lilly. ‘‘why are you hiding your real feelings? talk to your mom. you’re not happy about her and mr gianini. tell her this.’’ but i can’t talk to my mom. she’s very happy about her date with mr gianini. she’s being really nice to me. last night, she made a special meal for me—pasta with lots of vegetables.

i’m a vegetarian, so i don’t eat meat. i think about my mom kissing mr gianini. then i think about lana weinberger and josh richter. i saw them kissing last week. i want josh richter to kiss me like that. thursday, september 25th today, mr gianini asked me a really easy question, but i didn’t hear it. i just sat there, looking at him. "what?” i said. then lana weinberger leaned over my desk and stared at me. her long blond hair touched my desk. “freak,” she said.

i went to lilly’s apartment after school. her parents— the doctors moscovitz—were there. “your mother is dating your algebra teacher,” lilly’s mother said. “how do you feel about that?” “i feel fine.â doctor moscovitz,” i said. but i was lying. lilly’s older brother, michael, was also in the apartment. he’s a senior student, like josh richter. but michael doesn’t play sports like josh. michael is only interested in computers. he spends a lot of time in his room, working on his computer.

he writes an online magazine called crackhead, “your mom is dating frank gianini?” said michael. and he laughed. friday, september 26th this afternoon, during my algebra class, mr gianini spoke to me quietly he started talking about his date with mom. “mia, i'm going out with your mother,’' he said. “are you unhappy about that?’’ “oh, no, mr gianini, it’s ok,” i said. i felt my face becoming red. “it’s only for one date, isn’t it?” “well, maybe i’ll take her on more than one date. i really like your mother.’’ “ok,” i said. “but if you make her unhappy. i’ll kill you.’’

i’ve been very rude to a teacher! did i really say that to him? mr gianini smiled. “mia, i’m not going to hurt your mother,” he said. “i will never upset her.’’ that evening, when my mom was out with mr gianini, my dad called from genovia. he wanted to talk to mom. he sounded very weird. his voice was really strange. i didn’t want to tell him about mom and her date with mr gianini.â i lied. “she’s working in her art studio,” i said. saturday, september 27th i went into the kitchen early this morning.

my cat, fat louie, wanted some food. my mom was there, and she was making pancakes! i couldn’t believe it. mom never cooks breakfast. she usually wakes up later than me. she was in a very good mood. she was smiling happily “i had a wonderful time last night,” she said. mom and mr gianini ate dinner at a thai restaurant last night. they’re going on another date this week. i feel ok about this. i’m happy because my mom is happy. sunday, september 28th my dad called again today.

this time. mom was in her art studio. my dad sounded very weird again. monday, september 29th today, mr gianini was in a very good mood. suddenly he started talking about the school play all the students are going to act and sing in the musical, my fair lady, “mia, you could play the main character,’’ he said. i was surprised. mr gianini was only being nice. i knew that. but i can’t be in a musical. i can’t sing—my voice is horrible. later, when i was with lilly, lana weinberger came up to us. she started calling me a freak again. josh richter was with her.

i knew why lana said this. she wanted to hurt me. and she wanted josh to see my unhappiness. “leave us alone, weinberger!” said lilly angrily. lana started to argue with lilly but lilly isn’t afraid of lana. she just laughs if people say bad things to her. tuesday, september 30th something weird has happened. when i got home from school, my mom was waiting for me. she had a strange look on her face. she spoke softly and quietly.

“your dad called,” she said. “he’s very upset. he’s heard some bad news. he’s sterile. he can’t have any more kids.’’ about a year ago, my dad was very ill. he had cancer. he had an operation—doctors had to cut the cancer out of his body. then he had chemotherapy treatment. the chemotherapy worked well and the cancer hasn’t come back. “the chemotherapy has made your dad sterile,” mom said. “he can never have another child.’’ i don’t understand why my dad is upset. why does he want more kids? he already has me.

i only see dad at christmas and in the summer, but that’s ok. he looks after genovia and he’s always very busy. my dad’s hair fell out after the chemotherapy, but he’s still handsome. he looks like captain jean-luc picard in the tv show, star trek: the next generation. my dad has had a lot of girlfriends. he brings them to grandmere’s house in france. they love the twenty-seven bedrooms, the ballroom, the swimming pools, and the farm. but dad never goes out with any girl for more than a few months. “dad is flying here, to new york, tomorrow,” said mom. “he wants to talk to you, mia.’’

chapter 2: “you’re a princess!” wednesday, october 1st my dad has arrived in new york. he’s staying at the plaza hotel, where all the rich people stay. thursday, october 2nd. afternoon. the ladies’ room at the plaza hotel i’ve had a terrible shock. now i know why my dad wants more kids. it’s because he’s a prince! my dad is a politician and he’s rich.

but he’s also the prince of genovia, and nobody told me! i’ve been to genovia lots of times. every summer, i stay in my grandmother’s house, miragnac. it’s on the border of france, near genovia. why didn’t she tell me the truth? a few years ago, i found some information about genovia in an encyclopedia. i read these facts. the name of the genovian royal family was renaldo. the head of the family was prince artur christoff philippe gerard grimaldi renaldo. there was a picture of the prince. he had thick thrown hair and a moustache. my dad’s family name is also renaldo. my dad’s name is philippe renaldo.

this afternoon, my dad and i sat in the palm court dining room at the plaza hotel. lots of tourists go there. they like to have tea there in the afternoons. “i want you to know the truth, mia,” began my dad in a very serious voice. “i am the prince of genovia.’’ this news was a terrible shock for me. suddenly, i got hiccups! “really, dad?” i said. hiccup. i tried to stop the noise coming from my throat. but i couldn’t. hiccup. hiccup! they were really loud hiccups! hiccup! hiccup! “i’m head of the royal family of genovia,” said my dad. “your mother didn’t want you to know this.

she didn’t want you to grow up in a palace. i agreed with her. but unfortunately, i’ve now heard some bad news. i can’t have any more children. you’re my only child, mia. so you are now my heir. when i die, you will be the ruler of genovia.’’ i hiccupped again. this was really embarrassing! the people who were sitting on the table beside us were staring at me. “mia?” said my dad. “are you listening?” “dad, please excuse me for a minute,” i said. “i have to go to the bathroom.’’ i went into the ladies’ room.

the ladies’ room at the plaza is very beautiful. the walls and the carpets are pink. there are mirrors and little couches everywhere. i thought about what my dad had said. he’s the prince of genovia. i’m beginning to understand some things that i didn’t understand before. when i fly to france, there’s always a huge limousine waiting for me at the airport. when i go shopping with my grandmother, we always visit stores in the evening. we go shopping after ordinary people have gone home. we’re always the only customers in the stores.

most people have never heard of genovia. nobody famous has come from there. but it is a very beautiful country. the weather is warm and sunny. in the north, there are mountains covered with snow. in the south, there is the blue mediterranean sea. in the center of the country, there are hills covered with olive trees. olive oil is genovia’s main export. genovia sells a lot of olive oil to other countries. there’s a royal palace in genovia. i’ve passed it lots of times when i was in the car with grandmere.

but she never told me who lived in it. my hiccups have gone now. i’ll go back to my dad. late afternoon. the penguin house at central park zoo i’ve had a second shock. i’m not going to tell anybody about my family. i’m not even going to tell lilly. she won’t understand. no one will understand. i’m really upset. this is what happened. when my hiccups disappeared, i returned to the palm court dining room. my dad was speaking on his cellphone. he was talking to my mom.

“yes, i told her,” he was saying. “no, she doesn’t seem upset.’’ he looked at me. “are you upset?” “no,” i said. i wasn’t upset—not then. my dad ended the call. “did you understand what i told you, mia?” he asked. “yes,” i said. “you’re the prince of genovia.’’ “yes,” he said. “but you’re not mia thermopolis any more.’’ “i’m not?” i said. “then who am i?”

“you’re amelia mignonette grimaldi thermopolis renaldo, princess of genovia,” said my dad, a little sadly. what? a princess? me? it can’t be true. my mouth opened but no words came out. i started to cry. my dad leaned across the table and touched my hand. “it won’t be so bad,” he said. “you’ll like living at the palace in genovia with me. you can visit new york. you can see your friends as often as you want.’’ then i got mad. i was so angry that i stopped crying. “i don't want to live in genovia,” i said in a loud voice.

everyone in the dining room turned and looked at me. my dad was shocked. “mia,” he said, “i thought that you understood.’’ “i understand only one thing,” i said. “you lied to me all my life. you never told me the truth about your family. and why do i have to live with you in genovia?” i stood up quickly and ran out of the hotel. i ran all the way down the street and into the middle of central park. it was getting dark, but i didn’t think about this.

suddenly i saw the gates of the central park zoo. i’ve always loved that zoo. i paid my entrance money and went into the penguin house. the funny little black and white birds swam around their pool and i watched them. then i sat down and took my diary out of my bag. i’m writing in my diary now. what am i going to do? i can’t leave new york and live in genovia. evening of course, i couldn’t hide in the penguin house for ever. when the zoo closed, i took a bus home.

my mom and dad were sitting at the kitchen table. the phone was in front of them. they both began talking at the same time. “are you ok? where have you been?” asked my mom. “we’ve been so worried!” said my dad. “i ran away. i’m sorry,” i said. then i went into the bathroom and took a bath. after lying in the hot water for a long time, i put on my favorite pajamas. then i picked up fat louie and went to bed.

before i fell asleep, i heard my mom and dad talking in the kitchen. chapter 3: lilly’s place friday, october 3rd. home when i woke up today, i felt better. it’s friday—the day before the weekend. friday is my favorite day of the week. mom was in the kitchen, making breakfast. dad was there too. he was sitting at the table and reading the new york times. and then i remembered. i’m a princess! suddenly, i felt unhappy again.

“we need to talk, mia,” said my dad. he folded his newspaper and laid it on the table. “come and sit down, mia. have some breakfast,” said my mom. “i’ve made everything that you like.’’ i didn’t want to talk about my future in genovia. “i have to go to school,” i said. “sit down!” said dad loudly. i sat down, and mom put some food onto my plate. “mia,” she said, “think of the lovely things that you can have in genovia.

when you’re sixteen, you can have a car. dad will buy you a car for your sixteenth birthday.’’ “i don’t want a car,” i said. “you’ve always wanted a horse, haven’t you?” she said. “you could have a horse in genovia. a nice gray one. my eyes filled with tears and i started to cry. “mom,” i said, “why are you saying this? don’t you love me any more? why are you making me leave? why do i have to live with dad? is it because you and mr gianini don’t—” then my mom started crying too. she jumped up from her chair and put her arms around me.

“no, mia,” she said. “i just want the best thing for you.’’ “so do i,” said my dad. “well, i want to stay here and finish high school,” i said. “that’s the best thing for me. then i’m going to join greenpeace. i’m going to save whales from danger.’’ “you’re not going to look after whales!” said my dad. “please, philippe,” said my mom. “we can’t talk about this now. mia has to go to school. she’s late.’’ i started looking for my coat. “yes,” i said. “i have to get to the subway station.’’

“no,” said my dad. “lars will drive you to school.’’ “but i have to meet lilly,” i said. “i meet her every day, and we go to school together on the subway.’’ “lars can pick up your friend too,” said dad. lars is my dad’s driver. he goes everywhere with my dad. but now i realize something. lars isn’t just my dad’s driver. lars is also my dad’s bodyguard. his job is to protect my dad. lars came up to the apartment and walked downstairs to the car with me. it was really embarrassing. algebra class

lilly was very surprised to see lars. “my dad’s in town and lars is my dad’s driver,” i said. “why are your eyes red?” asked lilly. “have you been crying? what’s happened?” “nothing has happened,” i said. i didn’t want to tell lilly the truth. now i’m sitting here in the algebra class. but i feel better. nobody can make me be a princess. this is america. people are free in america. they can live in any place and in any way that they want. if i don’t want to be a princess, i don’t have to be one. i’ll tell my dad tonight. late evening. lilly’s bedroom

i didn’t go to my extra algebra class with mr gianini this afternoon. when school finished, i spoke to lilly. “can i stay at your place tonight?” i asked. she said yes, so i called my mom. “can i stay the night at lilly’s apartment?” i asked her. “but, mia, your father wanted to have another talk with you this evening.’’ “i’ll be home tomorrow. mom,” i said quickly. “and i won’t forget to do the shopping on the way home.’’ saturday, october 4th. early morning. lilly’s place

i always have a great time when i stay with lilly the moscovitzes are nice and their apartment is huge. lilly’s parents—the doctors moscovitz—never forget to pay bills. they always have delicious food in their refrigerator. they even buy vegetarian food for me to eat. i love my mom very much. but she spends a lot of time in her art studio. she doesn’t spend much time at home with me. sometimes, mom forgets to pay the bills. sometimes, she even forgets to buy food. i want my mom to be like lilly’s mom.

i want my dad to be like lilly’s dad. at lilly’s place, i can relax. i feel very comfortable and happy there. when i’m with the moscovitzes, i don’t worry about algebra. i don’t worry about being a princess. last night, lilly’s parents went out. so lilly and i climbed into their huge bed and watched james bond movies on their big tv. then lilly’s brother, michael, came into the room. “your dad is on the phone,” he said to me. “i don’t want to speak to him.’’ i replied.

"ok,” said michael. “you and lilly already went to bed. i’ll tell him that.’’ michael went and spoke to my dad again. then he came back and watched james bond movies with us. we had a really good conversation about our favorite actors and actresses. when lilly’s parents came home, lilly and i went back to her room. “mia, who do you prefer?” asked lilly. “josh richter, or my brother, michael?” “josh richter,” i said. i’m in love with josh richter. he’s the best-looking boy in the school.

i love his blond hair and blue eyes. but later, i thought about michael. he isn’t as good- looking as josh, but he makes me laugh. one time, i saw michael coming out of his bedroom. he wasn’t wearing a shirt, and he looked really good. i’ve never told lilly my thoughts about her brother. she’ll think that i’m weird. chapter 4: the thermopoli renaldo agreement saturday, october 4th. afternoon i stayed at lilly’s place as long as i could today. but i was worried about my mom and dad. i didn’t go home last night.

were they angry all night? i came home after lunch. i’ve always been a good daughter. i don’t smoke cigarettes, and i don’t take drugs. i do my homework most of the time, and people trust me. i’m an honest person. when i got home, my mom was reading a magazine. she always goes to her art studio on saturdays. but today she had stayed at home, waiting for me. my dad was there too. he was reading the new york times. “we must talk,’ he said.

“please, dad,” i said. “i need time to think about things.’’ “i know,” said my dad. then my mom came over and put her arms around me. “we’re so sorry, mia,” she said. i was very surprised. why were my parents being so nice? why weren’t they angry with me? “this is difficult for you, mia,” said my dad. “we understand that now. so we’ve done something to make things easier.’’ my dad pulled a document from his pocket and put it on the table in front of me. i started to read it.

the thermopolis-renaldo agreement i, artur christoff philippe gerard grimaldi renaldo, make this agreement. my daughter and heir, amelia mignonette grimaldi thermopolis renaldo, can stay at her school, albert einstein high school. but she must spend every christmas and every summer in genovia. i felt very happy. then i read the rest of the agreement. i, amelia mignonette grimaldi thermopolis renaldo, will do my duties as heir to artur christoff philippe gerard grimaldi renaldo, prince of genovia. i will become the ruler of genovia when he dies. i will also go to all the functions of state. “what are functions of state?” i asked.

‘‘special ceremonies,” said my dad. “when an important event happens in the world, every country sends someone— a representative. for example, when the leader of a country marries or dies, a representative of the genovian royal amily goes to the ceremony. you’re the princess of genovia, so you will go to these functions of state. you will represent genovia.’’ “but i don’t know how to behave like a princess,” i said. “that’s ok,” said my dad. “grandmere will teach you.’’ i thought about this. how can grandmere teach me? she’s not here in new york, she’s in france. i signed my name at the bottom of the agreement.

evening it’s saturday night, and i don’t have a date with a boy. i’m spending the evening with my dad! i’m always at home on saturday nights. boys don’t want to go out with me. my mom has gone out on a date with mr gianini. she was wearing a small black dress and high-heeled shoes. my dad stared and stared at her. she looked really beautiful. usually, my mom isn’t very interested in clothes. i phoned a restaurant that delivers food to the apartment. i ordered a pizza and some salad. it was a delicious meal.

but my dad wasn’t interested in the food. he watched sports programs on tv and drank whisky. then he fell asleep. i tried to call lilly, but her phone was busy. maybe michael was chatting online with a friend. michael uses his computer at lot. he works on his magazine, crackhead, and chats online with his friends for hours. he uses his computer to send instant messages. he has conversations in internet chatrooms. i really wanted to speak to lilly. i wasn’t going to tell her about being a princess.

but sometimes just talking to lilly makes me feel better. i watched my dad sleeping. i started to get bored. i decided to send michael an instant message. i wanted him to go offline. then i could call lilly. michael and i use different names when we chat to each other online. tin “ftlouie,” which means fat louie. it s the name of my cat. michael uses the name “cracking”—a criminal who sells drugs. michael is clever and funny. he’s always making jokes. this was our conversation:

cracking: what do you want, thermopolis? ftlouie: i want to talk to lilly. i want to speak to her on the phone. please go offline. cracking: what do you want to talk to her about? ftlouie: i'm not telling you. it's private. cracking: why are you at home? didn't dreamboy call you? didn't he ask you out? ftlouie: who's dreamboy? cracking: josh richter, of course. i love josh richter, and now michael knows this! lilly told her brother my secrets! fm really embarrassed! fm going to kill her!

but five minutes later, my phone rang. it was lilly. “you wanted to talk to me,” she said. ‘‘michael told me.’ michael can be so nice sometimes. sunday, october 5th i didn’t go to mr gianini’s algebra class on friday, and he told my mom. i can’t believe it! i had to stay at home today. i had to study algebra with my dad! there’s an algebra test at school tomorrow. i must not flunk it. i’ve written an important algebra formula on the bottom of my sneaker.

i can look at the formula during the test. monday, october 6th, 3:00 a.m. i’ve been awake all night. i’ve been worrying about the algebra formula that’s on my shoe. what will happen if someone sees it? if i look at the formula, i’ll be cheating. i’ll no longer be an honest person. i’ll have to leave albert einstein high school if someone finds out about this. and i’ll never get a job at greenpeace. 4:00 a.m: i tried to wash the formula off my sneaker, but it won’t come off! i can’t wear my boots instead of my sneakers. the laces of my boots are broken. 7:00 a.m. someone will see me cheating in the algebra test. i just know it.

9:00 a.m. i’m in the girls’ room at school. lana weinberger came in and she saw me washing the bottom of my sneaker. then she started brushing her long blond hair, and staring at herself in the mirror. i couldn’t wash the formula off my sneaker. but i’m not going to look at it during the test. ok—i looked at the formula during the test. but it didn’t help me at all. i got all the answers wrong anyway. i can’t even cheat well! i have so many things to worry about. i must buy new laces for my boots. i’m flunking algebra. my mom’s dating my algebra teacher. i’m the princess of genovia. i hate my life.

chapter 5: grandmere wednesday, october 8th grandmere’s here! she’s not here in our apartment. but she’s here in new york. she’s staying at the plaza hotel, with my dad. maybe grandmere won’t come to our apartment. she hates cats and fat louie is here. also, grandmere will hate greenwich village. no one is allowed to smoke cigarettes in the restaurants here and she smokes all the time. why did she have to come here? why? why? why?

thursday, october 9th i found out why grandmere has come to new york. she’s going to give me princess classes! this is terrible. i can’t write any more. friday, october 10th yesterday, after school, i had my first princess class. it’s not a joke. every day, after my algebra lesson with mr gianini, i have princess classes at the plaza with my grandmother. i signed the thermopolis-renaldo agreement.

my dad reminded me about this. the princess classes are part of my duties as my dad’s heir. that’s what i agreed to. i checked the agreement. but i couldn’t see anything in it about princess classes. grandmere is staying in the penthouse suite of the plaza. she’s staying in the huge, luxury rooms on the top floor of the hotel. everything in the penthouse is colored pink. there are pink walls, pink carpets, pink drapes, and pink furniture. there are lots of vases of pink roses too.

grandmere s name is clarisse marie renaldo. she is my father's mother. she is the dowager princess of genovia. grandmere wears lots of makeup and smokes cigarettes all the time. all her clothes are purple. purple is her favorite color. grandmere started asking me questions immediately. she is scary. she frightens me. “stand up straight, amelia,’ she said. “your hair is too curly. and why are you so tall? can’t you stop growing? come and kiss your grandmere.’’ i walked over and kissed her.

then i saw rommel—my grandmother’s dog. he was looking out from behind her skirt. he’s fifteen years old and he was wearing a purple jacket. it’s the same color as grandmere’s dress. “now,” said grandmere, “you are princess of genovia. you cried when your father told you the news. why?” suddenly i felt very tired. i sat down on one of the pink chairs. “oh, grandma,” i said in english. “i don’t want to be a princess. i just want to be me—mia.’’ “don’t call me grandma,” said grandmere.

“i’m your grandmere. speak french when you speak to me. sit up straight in that chair. and your name isn’t mia—it’s amelia.’’ she sat down in the chair next to me. “don’t you want to be a princess?” “grandma—i mean, grandmere,” i said, “i can never be like a princess.’’ “you are your father’s heir,” said grandmere in a very serious voice. “when your father dies, you’ll rule genovia.’’ i stared at grandmere and she stared at me. “i have a lot of homework today,” i said.

“is this princess class going to take a long time?” “we’ll begin classes tomorrow,” she said. “you’ll come here in the afternoons, after school. write a list before you come here tomorrow. make a list of the ten women who you admire most. and give reasons. bring the list with you.’’ my mouth fell open with shock. homework?" i’ve got to do homework for these princess classes? “close your mouth, amelia,” said grandmere. “tomorrow you’ll do your hair nicely.

you’ll wear lipstick and paint your nails with nailpolish. and you won’t wear those big, ugly boots. now i have a dinner appointment. goodbye.’’ today, i borrowed one of my mom’s lipsticks and took it to school. but i didn’t want anyone to see me wearing lipstick. i waited until after my class with mr gianini. when all the other kids had gone home, i went into the girls’ room. i put lipstick on my lips and brushed my hair. my hair is very curly. i brushed it and brushed it, but it didn’t look better.

i’d forgotten about the school computer club. the computer club has a meeting at albert einstein high school every friday afternoon. lilly’s brother, michael, is in the computer club. when i walked out of the girls’ room, i met michael. i dropped my bag and the lipstick fell out. michael picked it up. he stared at me in surprise. “why are you wearing this?” he asked, holding the lipstick toward me. “please don’t tell lilly,” i said. “don’t tell lilly what?” he said.

“where are you going? are you going on a date?” “no, i am not going on a date!” i said. “i have to meet my grandmother.’’ “do you usually wear lipstick when you meet your grandmother?” i looked toward the door. dad’s bodyguard, lars, was standing there. he was waiting for me. he was going to drive me to the plaza hotel. “michael, don’t tell lilly about this. ok?” i said. then i ran away. when i got to the plaza, grandmere was horrible. “you’re wearing too much lipstick,” she said. “and it’s the wrong color for you.’’

i gave her my list of the ten women who i admire. but she tore up the piece of paper. “they’re not good choices,” she said. then she told me to come back at ten o’clock the next morning. “grandmere, tomorrow is saturday,” i said. “i always help my friend, lilly, on saturdays. we film her tv show.’’ but grandmere didn’t listen to me. so when i got home, i called lilly. i wanted to say, “i can’t help you tomorrow. i have to spend the day with my grandmother.’’ but no one answered the phone. the moscovitz family were out.

saturday, october 11th, 9:30 a. i called lilly early this morning. this was our conversation. “you have to spend the day with your grandmother?' she said angrily. “i don’t believe you, mia. why didn’t you say ‘no’ to your grandmother? we always spend saturdays together.’’ “lilly, you don’t know my grandmother,” i said. “she’s scary. i can’t just say ‘no’ to her.’’ “i don’t know your grandmother,” said lilly. “that’s true, mia. i don’t know anything about her. it’s very strange. you know all about my grandparents.’’

i’ve never introduced lilly to grandmere because grandmere hates children. also, she hates hearing about poor peoples’ problems. lilly makes tv films about the problems of poor people. i can’t introduce lilly to grandmere now. i’m a princess. i don’t want lilly to know about my future life in genovia. “well, come to my place tonight,” lilly said. “i have to finish my film. you can help me.’’ then she hung up the phone. now i’m in the car with lars. we’ve just arrived at the plaza hotel. i’m going to meet grandmere. chapter 6: blond hair and fake nails

saturday, october 11th. late afternoon i can never go to school again. i can never go anywhere again. i’m so embarrassed. i look awful. i’m really angry with grandmere. this morning, she was waiting for me in the entrance of the plaza hotel. “on y va,” she said, which in english means, “let’s go.’’ “let’s go where?” i asked. “chez paolo,” said grandmere. chez paolo means “paul’s house.’’

“maybe grandmere has a friend called paul,” i thought. “and maybe we’re going to his house.’’ but chez paolo wasn’t a house. it was a beauty salon, and paolo was a stylist. he makes ordinary people like me look beautiful. that is paolo’s job. first, he cut my hair short. then, he colored it blond. my real fingernails are very ugly because i bite them. so he stuck beautiful long fingernails made of plastic on top of my own nails.

then he put makeup on my face. when paolo had finished, i looked in a mirror. i got a shock. he had turned me into a different person! then grandmere took me to some very expensive shoe shops and clothes shops. she bought me four pairs of shoes, and lots of clothes. grandmere’s very happy because i don’t look like mia thermopolis any more. mia thermopolis never had blond hair or fake fingernails. mia thermopolis never wore makeup, or beautiful, expensive shoes and clothes. but i’m not happy at all. who am i now? i don’t know.

i’m not mia thermopolis. grandmere is turning me into someone else. as soon as i got home, i tried to talk to my dad. but he didn’t listen to me. “what’s the problem, mia?” he said. “you look beautiful. i like your new hairstyle. it’s very nice.’’ my mom came out of her bedroom. she was wearing a new skirt and top, and she looked great. she was going out on another date with mr gianini. my dad stared at her. “mia,” said my mom, “your grandmother is just trying to prepare you.’’

“prepare me for what?” i said. “i’m the princess of genovia but i don’t want anyone to know this.’’ “they’ll find out about you soon,” said my mom. “maybe they’ll read your story in the newspaper.’’ “why will it be in the newspaper?” i asked. my mom and dad looked at each other. then my dad took out his wallet. he opened it and took out some money. “all right, mia,” he said. “how much do you want?” i was shocked. so was my mom.

“i’m serious,” he said. “the thermopolis-renaldo agreement isn’t working. i want your grandmother to turn you into a princess. so i’ll pay you to go to the princess lessons. how much do you want, mia?” i started to speak. i didn’t want any money. but my dad said, “listen. i’ll give one hundred dollars a day to greenpeace. the money will arrive with a letter from you. the money will help greenpeace to save a lot of whales. but, you’ll learn how to be a princess. do you agree?”

i want to work for greenpeace when i leave school. if i pay them all that money, they’ll have to give me a job! so i agreed. i’ll learn to be a princess. evening: lilly moscovitz and i had a fight—a big argument. she isn’t my friend any more! this is what happened. i couldn’t help lilly with her film this morning. i had to go out with grandmere. so lilly told me to help her this evening. when i walked into the moscovitzes’ apartment, she stared at my hair. “what happened to you?” she said in a shocked voice.

“my grandmother took me to a guy called paolo. he—” but lilly wouldn’t let me finish my explanation. “your hair is the same color as lana weinberger’s,” she said. “and what are those things on your fingers? are those fake fingernails! lana weinberger has those too! you’re turning into lana weinberger!” i started to get angry. i am not turning into lana weinberger. “this wasn’t my idea,” i said. “it was my grandmother’s decision. i had to agree.’’ “why didn’t you say ‘no’ to your grandmother?” said lilly. “i asked you to help me. but you said ‘no.’

then your grandmother told someone to cut off your hair. she told them to color it yellow. and you let her do this.’’ i got really mad. it had been a very difficult day. “lilly!” i said angrily. “shut up,” i’ve never told lilly to shut up before. why was lilly telling me what to do? then michael came out of his bedroom. when he saw me, he looked very surprised. “what did you just say to me?” said lilly. she was angry now. “my mom, my dad, my grandmother and my teachers are always telling me what to do,” i said.

“you’re my friend. now you’re telling me what to do too.’’ “what is your problem?” said lilly. “i don’t have a problem,” i said. “but you seem to have a big problem with me. so i’m leaving. and,” i said, opening the door, “my hair is not yellow.’’ i went home and took a hot bath. then i picked up fat louie and got into bed. lilly hasn’t called and apologized. i’m not going to call her first. i looked in the mirror a few minutes ago. my hair doesn’t look so bad.

11:59 pm. lilly still hasn’t called. sunday, october 12th. morning something has just happened. it was very embarrassing. i walked into the kitchen to get some breakfast. my mom and mr gianini were sitting at the table. they were eating pancakes. they were very surprised to see me. “what are you doing here, mia?” asked mom. “you were going to stay at lilly’s place last night.’’

i didn’t reply. at that moment, i wanted to be at lilly’s place. i didn’t want to see mr gianini having breakfast in our kitchen. he had spent the night at our place with my mom. i didn’t want to know this. “frank missed his train home last night,” said my mom. “so i asked him to spend the night here. he slept on the couch in the living room.’’ she was lying—i knew that. but i didn’t say anything. late morning after breakfast, my mom and mr gianini went to central park.

they asked me to go with them. but i didn’t go. i have lots of homework to do. that’s what i told them. maybe they’ll kiss each other. i didn’t want to see that. people kiss on tv and that’s ok. but my mom kissing my algebra teacher? no! afternoon i’ve just turned on my computer. i’ve got an e-mail from michael moscovitz. he’s going to help me with my extra algebra. i can’t believe it! wasn’t that nice of michael? chapter 7: a new friend

sunday, october 12th. late evening my dad called me after lunch. “i want you to come to the plaza hotel this evening. i want you to have dinner with me and grandmere,” he said. “i’ll send lars to pick you up in the car.’’ when i told mom, she looked happy. ‘that s ok,’ she said. “i’ll stay here. i’ll order some food from my favorite thai restaurant. i’ll watch tv.’’ dinner at the plaza was very boring.

i couldn’t eat most of the food because it was meat. but i ate some fish, and some chocolate ice cream. dad kept asking me questions about mom and mr gianini. “do you feel ok about your mom dating your algebra teacher?” he asked. why is my dad asking me this? my mom likes mr gianini—i know that. but does she love him? i don’t know. i didn’t tell my dad about mr gianini staying the night. when i got home, i saw two empty cartons of thai food in the kitchen. “was mr gianini here for dinner?” i asked my mom.

“oh, no,” she said quickly. “i was very hungry, so i ordered two meals.’’ my mom has told me two lies today about mr gianini. monday, october 13th. morning this morning, i asked lars to stop the car at lilly’s apartment building. i wanted her to ride to school with us. but she had already left her apartment. i usually sit with lilly in our school cafeteria at lunchtime. but today, a boy called boris pelkowski was sitting beside lilly. he was sitting in the seat where i usually sit. lilly likes boris pelkowski because he’s a great musician.

boris comes from russia and he plays the violin. he also wears his clothes in a weird way. i got a plate of salad and looked around. most of the tables in the cafeteria were full of students. “who can i sit with?” i thought. tina hakim baba was sitting at one of the tables. no other students were sitting with her. tina’s parents are very rich. her father comes from saudi arabia and he owns an oil company. tina’s parents are frightened of kidnappers.

mr and mrs hakim baba don’t want kidnappers to take tina. kidnappers usually want lots of money before they release a person. people have been hurt or killed by their kidnappers. tina’s parents are very careful. they send her to school in a limousine with a bodyguard. the bodyguard follows tina everywhere. all the other students call tina a freak. tina was reading a book and the bodyguard was sitting beside her. tina had a plate of salad, just like me.

but she hadn’t chosen a salad because she’s a vegetarian. she’d chosen it because she’s a little heavy. she wants to lose weight. i walked over to her table and put my plate down. “can i sit here?” i asked. tina looked up in surprise. she looked at me and then she looked at the bodyguard. the bodyguard nodded. tina laid her book on the table and smiled. she has large brown eyes and a nice smile. “yes,” she said. “please sit with me.’’

tina and i ate our salads and talked about school. there’s going to be a dance at albert einstein on saturday. i asked tina if she had a date for the dance. “a boy from trinity is taking me to the dance,” she replied. trinity is a school for rich boys. i liked talking to tina. she wasn’t a freak at all. she was really nice. when she got up to get a drink, i looked at the book beside her plate. tina was reading a romantic novel called my name is amanda. lana weinberger walked over to the table.

‘‘what has happened to your hair, mia?'' she said loudly. “it’s a horrible yellow color. then tina came back, holding an ice cream. she gave the ice cream to me. ‘‘oh, tina," said lana, “did you buy that ice cream for mia? did your daddy give you money to buy a new friend?" tina was very hurt by lana's words and her eyes filled with tears. i felt very angry with lana. suddenly, i took the ice cream and pushed it onto lana's sweater. everyone in the cafeteria stopped talking. they stared at us. “look at what you've done!" lana screamed. i stood up, and picked up my plate of salad.

“come on, tina,” i said. “let s go somewhere quieter.’’ tina picked up her salad and followed me. her bodyguard followed too. he was laughing. lilly moscovitz was staring at me. her mouth was open with shock. late afternoon i'm in a lot of trouble. i'm sitting in principal gupta s office. principal gupta is the head of the school. i was sent here because i pushed ice cream into lana weinberger s sweater. pm worried. what s going to happen?

principal gupta has punished me. she has given me a week’s detention. every day next week, i have to stay for an hour after school, and do extra work. i also have to do my extra algebra every day with mr gianini, and the princess classes with grandmere. “lana’s sweater has to be cleaned and you must pay,” said principal gupta. “and you must apologize to her.’’ “i'm sorry. principal gupta,” i said, “i'll pay for lana’s sweater to be cleaned. but i won’t apologize to her.’’ principal gupta was surprised, but she wasn’t angry with me.

“mia,” she said quietly, “i'm worried. you’ve never been in trouble before. it... it is everything all right? do you have any problems at home?” i thought about all my problems. my mom is dating my algebra teacher. my best friend hates me. i'm fourteen and i’ve never had a date. i’m too tall and too thin. and i’m the princess of genovia. but i didn’t want to talk about these things with principal gupta. “everything’s fine,” i lied. “you’re a very special person,” said principal gupta. “you’re good and kind.

lana weinberger is just like you. she’s a very nice girl too.’’ principal gupta doesn’t understand. lana weinberger isn’t like me at all! tuesday, october 14th when lars and i arrived at school this morning, tina hakim baba was arriving at the same time. we smiled at each other, and went into school together. her bodyguard followed us. “i told my parents what happened yesterday,” said tina. “i told them what lana said. i told them about your fight with lana. they’ve invited you to dinner on friday. you can stay the night at my house.’’

“ok,” i said. i smiled: “thanks.’’ i like tina. she’s nice to me. i’ve just heard some news and i can’t believe it. lilly is going to the dance on saturday. she’s going with boris pelkowski! i’m the only girl in my class who doesn’t have a date for the dance. the only one. why am i such a freak? chapter 8: in the news tuesday, october 14th. evening this afternoon, while michael moscovitz was helping me with my algebra, he asked me a strange question.

“are you doing anything on saturday evening?’’ a teacher came into the room before i could reply but i knew what michael was going to ask me. he wanted me to meet him on saturday he was going to help me. he was going to give me some extra algebra work. i don’t want to do extra algebra—not on the weekend. grandmere is very happy she heard about my friendship with tina hakim baba. tina’s father is a rich saudi arabian prince. he knows lots of other rich people. wednesday, october 15 th when i got to school today, lots of kids were staring at me.

maybe there was something wrong with my hair. i went into the girls’ room to look in the mirror. some girls saw me. they ran out of the room, laughing. a weird thing just happened to me. josh richter, the most popular boy in the school, came up to me. “hi, mia.â how are you?” he asked. i couldn’t answer. josh richter never speaks to me. then he bent down until hi face was close to my face. his eyes are very blue.

“see you later,” he said softly. then he walked away. principal guptaoffice now i know why everyone was staring at me. i know why the girls ran out of the girls’ room. i know why they laughed at me. i know why josh richter spoke to me. my story is in the news! my picture is on the cover of a newspaper—the new york post the picture shows me leaving the plaza hotel on sunday night. over the photo are the words: princess amelia. new york’s royal princess.

mr gianini saw the picture on his way to work. he called my mom, but she didn’t hear the phone. so he called my dad at the plaza hotel. my dad told him to bring me to principal gupta’s office. while i waited for my dad, i looked at the new york post on principal gupta’s desk. i read the story about me. it was by a reporter called carol fernandez. she wrote about my mom and dad too. she called my mom, “the black-haired artist, helen thermopolis.’’ she called my dad, “the handsome prince, philippe of genovia.’’

and she called me, “the tall and beautiful princess of genovia.’’ carol fernandez must be crazy. i’m not beautiful! “mia, you’re a princess,” said principal gupta. “why didn’t you tell me?” “i didn’t want anyone to know,” i said. here comes my dad now. i’m mad with my dad. he made me stay at school and go back to my classes. “you don’t understand, dad,” i said. “all the kids are laughing at me. why did you tell carol fernandez about me?” “me?” said my dad in a surprised voice. “i didn’t tell that reporter anything.’’

then he looked mr gianini. mr gianini was standing by the door. his hands were in his pockets. “it wasn’t me,” replied mr gianini. “i didn’t speak to carol fernandez. i hadn’t heard of genovia until this morning.’’ “well, somebody told the newspapers about mia,” said my dad. “i’m going to call carol fernandez and ask her.’’ then he told lars to go with me to my classroom. “dad, i don’t need a bodyguard,” i said. “mia,” said my dad. “genovia is a small country but it’s very rich.

maybe someone will try to kidnap you.’’ “dad, no one is going to kidnap me,” i said. but my dad didn’t listen. now i have a bodyguard, just like tma hakim baba. everyone will laugh at me even more. suddenly i’m very popular. when i walked into the cafeteria at lunchtime, lana weinberger came up to me. “hey, amelia,” she said. “come and sit with us!” lana wants to be my friend now, because i’m a princess.

“no, thanks, lana,” i said. “i have someone to sit with.’’ i went to sit with tina. lana looked shocked. everyone in the cafeteria was staring at our table. tina looked at me sadly, but she didn’t say anything. “tina,” i said at last. “if you don’t want to sit with me, i’ll understand.’’ tina’s eyes filled with tears. “what do you mean, mia?” she said. “don’t you like me any more?” “of course i like you,” i said. “but everyone is staring at us because of me.’’

“no, mia,” she said. “they’re not staring because of you. everyone always stares at me. they stare at me because of wahim.’’ wahim is tma’s bodyguard. he and lars were sitting together at our table. the two men were talking about guns. i got mad then. i wasn’t mad with tina. i was mad with everyone else at albert einstein high school. nobody talks to tina.

“she’s a freak,” they say. “she’s weird.’’ but she’s a really nice girl. “i want to sit with you, tina,” i said. tina looked happier then. she started reading another romance today. she told me all about it. when michael moscovitz was helping me with my algebra, we had this conversation. lilly joined in too. michael: so you’re the princess of genovia? when were you going to tell your friends? me: i didn’t want anyone to know. michael: why? it’s not a bad thing. me: are you joking? of course it’s bad.

i don’t want a different life. i don’t want to be a princess. lilly: mia, your dad has more than three hundred million dollars. he’s never worked for it. i read this in a newspaper. did this money come from the poor people of genovia? michael: lilly, no one in genovia has to pay anything to their government. the country is very rich. everyone in genovia has a good education. maybe mia’s father gets paid well because he works very hard for his country. you’re jealous. lilly: i am not! michael: yes, you are.

mia got a new hairstyle, and she didn’t ask for your advice first. that’s why you’re jealous. then you stopped talking to her, and she found a new friend. all this time, mia had a secret. and she didn’t tell you about it. lilly (to michael): michael, shut up! michael (to me): does this guy (pointing to lars) follow you everywhere? does he go with you on dates? will he go with you to the dance this weekend? me: no, because no one has asked me. chapter 9: i’m famous! wednesday, october 15th. evening

i’m famous. when lars and i walked out of the school today, there were reporters everywhere. they started taking photos and shouting questions. “smile, please, amelia!” “hey, amelia, what’s it like being a princess?” i was frightened but lars helped me. first, he told me not to say anything. then he put his arm around me. he pushed me through the crowd of photographers and reporters. he pushed me into the back seat of dad’s car. then he jumped in beside me. “drive!” shouted lars.

i didn’t know the man who was driving the car. my dad was sitting next to him. “where will i go to school now. dad?” i asked. “you can stay at albert einstein high school,” said my dad. “lars will go with you every day. he’ll protect you.’’ “who will drive your car?” i asked. “hans,” said my dad, pointing to the driver. “he’s my driver now.’’ “will lars go everywhere with me?” i asked. “yes,” said my dad. suddenly, i understood.

i’ll never be able to go anywhere alone again. “i don’t want to be a princess any more,” i said. “you can take back your money. tell grandmere to go back to france. i’ve had enough.’’ “it’s too late, mia,” said my dad. “you are the princess of genovia. everyone knows that. tomorrow, there will be photos of you in every newspaper in america.’’ later my mom spoke to my dad. now he’s mad with her. “clarisse talked to carol fernandez about mia, didn’t she?” said mom.

“my mother didn’t tell that reporter about mia,” said my dad angrily. “why do you think that? maybe your boyfriend, frank gianini, spoke to the reporter.’’ then my mom got mad too. “get out,” she said in a cold voice. “leave my apartment.’’ “you don’t like my mother, so you can’t see the truth,’ said my dad angrily. ‘the truth?” said my mom, “i'll tell you the truth, philippe". - your mother i went to my room. i didn’t want to hear the fight between my parents. but is my mom right? did grandmere tell carol fernandez about me? thursday, october 16th

this morning, my picture was on the covers of the daily news newspaper, and the magazine new york newsday, the picture was also in the new york times. there were more reporters waiting for me outside school today. lars held my arm and we ran into school together. as we ran, the reporters were shouting questions. “amelia, who do you like best—leonardo dicaprio or prince william?” “princess amelia, why don’t you eat meat?” something very surprising has happened. i was in the cafeteria with tina and lars and wahim.

we were eating our lunch. suddenly, lana weinberger put her tray down next to mine. i’m not joking—lana weinberger sat beside me. then someone else put down a tray on the table. it was josh richter. “hey,” he said. he sat down in the seat next to me, and started eating. “are you going to the school dance this weekend, mia?” asked lana. “josh’s parents are away. after the dance, we’re all going to a party at josh’s place. will you come too?”

“i’m sorry,” i said. “i can’t.’’ lana stared at me. “what do you mean, you can't?” she said. i’ve heard about the seniors’ parties. everyone drinks lots of alcohol and gets very drunk. “my mom won’t let me go to a party like that,” i said. “don’t tell your mom the truth,” lana said. “say to her, ‘i’m spending the night with a girlfriend.’ but i could never tell this lie to my mom.

“i’m sorry,” i said, “everyone drinks a lot of alcohol at those parties. i don’t drink alcohol. alcohol is a poison. i don’t like putting poison into my body.’’ “i can understand that,” said josh richter suddenly. “josh!” said lana, laughing. “you drink more than anyone in the whole school.’’ josh didn’t laugh. he just stared at lana with his blue eyes. it wasn’t a very nice stare. when classes finished, josh was waiting outside my classroom. “hey,” he said. then he smiled.

it was a big smile that showed all his teeth. they were very white. “are you going to the dance with anyone?” he asked. i dropped my book in surprise. i bent down to pick it up. “n-no,” i said in a weak voice. “oh. well, i’ll see you,” said josh. then he left. i’m still shocked. josh richter talked to me today. twice. this evening, grandmere wanted to have dinner at an expensive restaurant. she wanted us to go outside the plaza hotel for a meal.

“there will be reporters outside,” she said. “i’ll teach you what to do.’’ but when we came out of the hotel, the reporters weren’t there. “wait one minute,’' said grandmere. she went back into the hotel. i got into the car. she came out of the hotel again a little later. when we arrived at the restaurant, lots of reporters were waiting. i was very surprised. immediately, they started taking photos and shouting questions. i turned to grandmere. “you called these reporters, didn’t you? you told them about our plan to eat here.

did you tell carol fernandez about me too? did you give her my story for her newspaper?” “of course,” said grandmere. “you have to learn how to live with reporters, amelia. it s part of being a princess.’’ “dad and mom had a big fight about the report in the new york posty'' i said. “but mr gianini didn’t talk to carol fernandez, did he? you did. i’m going to tell dad the truth. he’s going to be really mad at you, grandmere.’’ “no, he won’t be mad,” she said. “that story in the post was only the beginning. soon you’ll be on the cover of vogue magazine, and then—” “grandmere!” i shouted. “l don’t want to be on the cover of vogue!”

when i got home, i called my dad. “dad, grandmere told carol fernandez everything about me,” i said. “it wasn’t mr gianini.’’ “i know,” he said in an unhappy voice. “well,” i said, “you have to apologize to mom.’’ later, my dad called my mom. afterwards she looked very happy. maybe my dad apologized to her. chapter 10: my first date friday, october 17 th josh and lana have broken up! i can t believe this.

josh has ended his relationship with lana. he doesn’t want her as his girlfriend any more. everyone in school is talking about it. when i saw lana, she looked awful. her eyes were red— she had been crying. after the first lesson josh richter came up to me after my english class. “hey, mia, who are you going with to the dance tomorrow?’’ he asked. “er.... no one,” i replied. “well, why don’t we go together?” he said.

i couldn’t speak for a minute. josh richter and me on a date!!! then i heard a tiny voice inside my head. he's only asking you because you re the princess of genovia. but i didn’t want to listen to the voice. “yeah, ok,” i said. “that might be fun.’’ “fine,” said josh. “i’ll come for you at seven o’clock. we’ll go to a restaurant—tavern on the green—and have dinner first.’’ i’m going to the dance with josh, and lilly has found out.

now she’s speaking to me again. but she only says bad things about josh. “he’s just broken up with lana,” she said. “he broke up with her sixteen hours ago. then this afternoon he asks you out. he’s bad, mia. and he takes drugs.’’ some of josh’s friends take drugs—this is true. but does josh take drugs? i can’t believe that. lana looks so sad, and josh doesn’t seem to care. he and his friends sat with tina and me at lunch today.

but josh and his friends didn’t talk to us. they just talked to each other. i feel bad about lana. but i still want to go to the dance with josh. my princess class with grandmere ended after an hour. this is because i’m going to spend the night at tina’s place. i told grandmere about the dance and josh’s invitation. grandmere was very pleased. she called a famous fashion company. she made an appointment for me tomorrow. i’m going to their store to choose a new dress. after i left grandmere’s suite, i went to tma’s huge, luxury apartment.

tina has three little sisters and a baby brother. she also has a big tv in her room, and a sony playstation. tina’s parents are really nice. mr hakim baba isn’t well. he has a problem with his heart. he can’t eat meat. he only eats vegetables and rice. mrs hakim baba is very beautiful. she’s british and she has blond hair. she used to be a fashion model. her picture was once on the cover of vogue, but she doesn’t work now.

tina showed me her dress for the dance. it’s very pretty. she looks much more like a princess than i do. saturday, october 18th when i got home, mr gianini was there. “has josh called?” i asked my mom. “you don’t mean josh richter, do you?” asked mr gianini. “yes,” i said. “i’m going to the dance with josh tonight.’’ “but what about lana weinberger?” asked mr gianini in a surprised voice. “she is josh’s girlfriend.’’

“they broke up,’ i said. “who’s josh richter?’ asked my mom. “he’s the most gorgeous boy in the school,” i said. “well, he’s the most popular,” said mr gianini. “but he isn’t the right kind of boy for mia.’’ “oh,” said my mom. “then i have to talk to mia’s father.’’ she called my dad at the plaza hotel. as she was speaking to him, the front door bell rang.

mr gianini opened the door. “i’m clarisse marie renaldo—the dowager princess of genovia,” said a loud voice. “who are you?' it was grandmere! she had come to our apartment. she was going to take me shopping. she stared at mr gianini. “grandmere,” i said, “they won’t let me go to the dance.’’ my mom was still talking to my dad on the phone. grandmere came into the apartment and took the phone from mom’s hand. “philippe,” grandmere said into the phone. “your daughter is going to the dance tonight with her boyfriend.

i’m going to buy her a new dress. i’m taking her to the store now.’’ then grandmere spoke quickly to my dad. she used some rude words. but she spoke in french, so only i understood her. my mom and mr gianini didn’t understand what she was saying. when grandmere put the phone down, she looked around our apartment- “the princess of genovia lives here?" she asked. “in this place?” “now listen, clarisse—said my mom angrily. “go and get your coat, amelia,'’ said grandmere. i went to get my coat.

when i returned to the living room, my mom’s eyes were very red. mr gianini was looking at the floor. then i went shopping with grandmere. mom and mr gianini didn’t stop me. it’s after seven o’clock and i’m waiting for josh. i’m sitting and writing my diary. i’m wearing my new dress and my new shoes. my hair and my makeup and nails are perfect. my dress is pale blue silk and it’s beautiful. my dad is sitting at the kitchen table. my mom keeps looking at the clock.

“you can go out with josh,” said my dad, “but lars has to go with you.’’ my dad looked at his watch. “it’s seven" fifteen,” he said. “josh richter is late.’’ the front door bell has just rung. josh is here! the ladies room, tavern on the green i’m sitting in the ladies’ room of the restaurant—tavern on the green. josh was good with my parents. my dad asked him lots of questions. questions such as: what car are you driving? what time will you be back? which college are you going to after high school?

josh answered all my dad’s questions politely. he even called my dad “sir”! then josh and lars and i went down to the street. josh had come in his father’s car. we got into it. lars drove, and josh and i sat in the back seat. we talked for a few minutes, but then a strange thing happened. josh and i didn’t have anything more to say to each other. we didn’t talk for the rest of the ride to the restaurant. i don’t have this problem with lilly’s brother michael.

michael moscovitz and i never stop talking. when we got to the restaurant, josh’s friends and their girlfriends were sitting at a big table. josh ordered bottles of champagne. then, without asking me, he ordered steaks too. but i’m a vegetarian and i won’t eat meat. i haven’t eaten my steak and josh hasn’t noticed. he’s talking and laughing with his friends. he hasn’t spoken to me since we got to the restaurant. he has ordered more and more champagne.

why does he want to drink so much? this evening is not going well, so i came into the ladies’ room. but i’ll have to go back to the table soon. chapter 11: the wrong kind of boy saturday, october 18th. evening. the girls’ room, albert einstein high school i’ve found out the truth about josh. i can’t believe what he’s done! ! we stayed in the restaurant for a long time.

josh and his friends drank nine bottles of champagne. we were late getting to the dance. when we arrived at the school, there were lots of news reporters’ vans outside the building. there was a big crowd of reporters. they were shining big bright lights onto the steps at the front of the school. some reporters were checking their cameras and tape recorders. others were talking on their cellphones. they were all waiting for someone—me! who told all the reporters that i was coming to the dance?not grandmere this time.

lars was very angry when he saw the crowd. but josh didn’t care. “come on,” he said to me. “we’ll run up the steps into the school while lars parks the car.’’ josh held my hand and pulled me out of the car. then he pulled me up the steps to the school doors. when the reporters saw me, they shouted, “it’s her! it’s princess mia!” they started taking pictures and shouting questions. the lights of the cameras’ flashbulbs were very bright. i couldn’t see where i was going. i held josh’s hand tightly. at last, i saw the school doors in front of us. josh stopped. below us, the reporters were screaming questions and taking photos.

“kiss her! kiss her!” they shouted. suddenly josh turned toward me and kissed me on the lips. at once, all the cameras’ flashbulbs went off. the reporters were taking pictures of princess mia’s first kiss. but i didn’t feel happy and romantic. i felt embarrassed. josh turned to the reporters. he waved his hand and smiled. then he opened the doors to the school and pushed me inside. my friends were standing inside the school hall—tina and her boyfriend, lilly and boris. mr gianini, and other students from school were there too.

everyone was looking at me. i couldn’t think clearly. josh richter had just kissed me on the lips. he had kissed me, and all the reporters had taken a picture. then i realized the truth. josh wanted to date a princess. so he broke up with lana. then he invited me to the dance. he told the reporters about the dance. he told them about me. he wanted to get his picture in the papers with me. i turned and stared at josh.

“why did you kiss me in front of everyone?” i asked angrily. “the reporters were shouting ‘kiss her! kiss her!’” said josh. “they wanted a good photo. so i kissed you.’’ “you didn’t kiss me because you like me,” i said. “you kissed me because i’m the princess of genovia.’’ “of course i like you,” said josh. “no,” i said. “you don’t care about me. you don’t know me. you don’t know my feelings or thoughts. you haven’t asked what i like.

you ordered a steak for my dinner, but you didn’t ask me first.’’ my friends were all staring at josh. “mia is a vegetarian, you idiot,” said lilly. “oh, sorry,” said josh. but he didn’t sound very sorry. “are you ready to dance?” i didn’t reply. i didn’t want to dance with josh. i turned and walked away into the girls’ room. tomorrow, pictures of josh kissing me will be in all the newspapers.

will the words; young royal is in love be above the pictures? i’m not in love with josh any more. i don’t want a boyfriend like him. he only wants me because i’m a princess. when my dad sees the photos, he’s going to be really mad. then i heard lilly and tina’s voices. they had come into the girls’ room. “are you ok, mia?” lilly asked in a kind voice. “i’m sorry about everything. come and join us.’’ “i can’t,” i said. “you all have dates. i don’t have one.’’ “michael is here,” said lilly. “he doesn’t have a date.’’

michael moscovitz is at the dance? i’m coming out! sunday, october 19th. lilly’s place lilly and i aren’t fighting any more. and lilly and tina have become friends. there weren’t any pictures of josh kissing me in the newspapers today. there was more important news. yesterday, iran attacked afghanistan. all the news reports were about the fighting. i had a wonderful time with michael at the dance.

we talked a lot, and we danced together. it was wonderful standing close to michael and holding him. then we all went back to lilly’s place in tina’s car. i called my mom. she let me stay with lilly last night. this morning i woke up early. i can hear lilly’s family making breakfast in the kitchen. i am so happy! evening. my apartment grandmere and dad came here this afternoon. they wanted to know about the dance.

i didn’t tell dad about my kiss with josh. i spoke to lars earlier. he promised not to tell my dad either! i won’t have any princess classes for a whole week. grandmere is going away for several days. later in the afternoon, i took grandmere up to the roof of our apartment. my mom and dad came out onto the roof too. there is a wonderful view of the city from our roof. you can see all of manhattan and the hudson river. the sun was just going down, and the sky was purple and pink and orange.

we all stood on the roof and watched the beautiful sunset. i felt very peaceful and happy. maybe everything is going to be all right. maybe my life as a princess will be ok too!